---
title: Episode 104 How To Improve Your Voice
episode_number: 104
era: mid
source_file: Episode 104 How To Improve Your Voice.mp3
audio_size_mb: 52.9
duration_sec: 1732.8
duration_min: 28.9
language: en
provider: deepgram
model: nova-3
diarized: true
confidence: 0.998
transcribed_at: 2026-05-27T16:52:13Z---

# Episode 104 How To Improve Your Voice

**Speaker 0:** Imagine how much fun it is to ride your favorite roller coaster. The ride is climbing up and up and you can feel your heart pounding with excitement. You feel yourself breathing faster and faster. Sometimes you're even gasping and panting as you feel the blood rushing through every part of your body. And as that excitement and tension is building and building, you reach the top of the ride. And then at its crest, you just release it all in a flood of excitement and sometimes you're screaming because you're so turned on. Tom Torero podcast a 104, how to improve your voice. That was a bit of old school NLP bullshit. Do I believe in NLP and patterns? No. But do I believe in the power of the male voice for seduction? Yes. And more importantly, do I believe you can change your voice like your posture or your fashion or your diet? Yes. If you remember my old infields from 2011, 2012, you'll remember the nice guy, primary school teacher, Tom Torero speaking a lot quicker, the pitch was a lot higher, I was a lot more supplicating and guys often comment, how did you change your voice? That's what this podcast is about. Here are the plugs before we begin. No more NLP bullshit, I promise you. If you want to hear me for seventeen hours in field and see me, daygaming, texting, dating, seducing, go to my website tomterreyro.com and look at stealth seduction. That's my infield product. If you prefer reading my textbook on daygame and texting and dating and seducing and relationships and life, that is Street Hustle, my a to z textbook. Both of those products and more are on my website tomterrero.com. Okay. Plug over. Podcast 104, how to improve your voice. We shall be looking at examples of a good male voice. We shall be breaking down the nice guy syndrome, which is what I suffered from, many of my students suffer from. And we shall be looking at practical ways to improve your voice in terms of projection. So the volume and color in your voice, the pitch of your voice, crucial for daygame, The pace of your voice. Now normally when I'm recording podcasts, I speak like this because I'm aware of the 30, I'm aware of being engaging, but today, I'll try to slow it down to speak as I do on the street, on dates, when a girl is back at mine. If you've seen Stealth Seduction, you'll be aware of how my voice differs from that to the podcast. The podcast is a different beast, but today I shall try to slow down. And finally, we shall be looking at how persuasive your voice is as a bonus. For a hustler, it's key. If you want to be a leader, people have to feel that self assuredness, the lack of hesitation in your voice. You got to own your words. Yeah? You got to be irrationally self confident. We'll talk about that at the end of the podcast. Okay. I was a school teacher, that was a blessing and a curse because yes, I had conviction and yes, I had projection but I was a primary school teacher. So I had that voice like you're talking to a puppy. That voice which is not from your diaphragm, it's not from your lungs, it's in your throat. Even worse, it's in your nose, it's very nasally and the pitch is something like this. The end of the sentences are inflected because it's basically saying, please like me. So this is a voice from my throat or even worse from my nose and that causes a lot of sore throats, especially at the beginning of the term in September because you're projecting from the wrong place, you're trying to out shout the kids, it's a losing battle. And the whole nicey nicey teacher thing, trying to be their pal, trying to be their friend, trying to get them to like you, it's doomed to fail, just like trying to be the nice guy with girls. So the primary school teacher voice, the elementary school teacher voice, it was both a blessing and a curse. And as I said, if you've seen my old infields, you'll see a big difference from I think there's a video when I'm in New York City, I think it's 2012, maybe 2013, I think it's 2012, it's snowing, it's cold in New York City but listen to my voice, that video is on YouTube compared to when I was in New York in 2016, big difference or the infields on stealth seduction. So, for sure, you can change your voice. Why do we need to change your voice? Well, it's obvious. Science tells you but practical infield experience tells you that women prefer deeper, more grounded, richer, not with money but richer as in the timber, the warmth, the color in your voice. This is what women prefer. Many studies, especially coming out of University College London, blindfolded studies where women can't see the guys, they can just hear their voices and just like we're attracted to the higher, more fragile kind of feminine voice, women are attracted to that grounded deeper male voice. Why? In terms of evolution, it means a larger frame. It means tribal leader. It means alpha. Okay? No. It's not just about aggression. The aggressive voice doesn't actually come out on top in terms of being sexy. You need that warmth, you need that empathy in there as well. And this is very normal across the animal kingdom, not just in mammals but with birds as well, where you advertise physical characteristics via the sound quality of your mating call and surprise, surprise, men and women are different. Men and women have different mating strategies, this is called sexual dimorphism shock horror. Men and women are different and they're after different things and your voice is a key component of that yes, non verbals are critical. I'd say more important than verbal. Eye contact, critical. But if we know that women are attracted to a specific kind of voice and we ignore that fact and we don't try to change any of the things that I'm going to talk about today, then it's silly, we're missing out. And if I can change my voice, you can change your voice. If I can change my posture, you can change your posture. If I'm trying to change my diet, then it's possible because other guys have tried and succeeded in changing their diet. If I can change my fashion, you can change your fashion, etcetera, etcetera. These are elements of the sexual market value for males that are in our control. So it would be silly if we didn't change them. Of course, attraction is made up of many other things. So along with the voice, it's the sub communication, it's the facial expressions, it's the gestures, it's what you look like. Of course, I'm not saying ignore that, but today, much requested, we're just going to focus on voice. Now, I could describe what a sexy male voice sounds like, but why don't we just listen to some voices that women pick out as being attractive?

**Speaker 1:** Little pop quiz, little pop quiz, see if you can identify these famous male voices. Here is the first one. It's like beauty, you know, in the eye of the beholder. I mean, the the people see it this way. There's really, only so much you can do in terms of trying to change their view of something.

**Speaker 0:** Did you get it? My favorite James Bond of all time that was Sean Connery, of course.

**Speaker 2:** Okay. Here's the next one. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you.

**Speaker 0:** That was Liam Neeson, of course. Maybe a bit threatening, but grounded, gravitas, gravelly.

**Speaker 3:** Okay. Fantastic. Here's the next one. One thing I can tell you, if you're looking to, improve your the sound of your voice, yawn a lot. That was the one, the only Morgan

**Speaker 0:** Freeman. Here's the next one.

**Speaker 2:** My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun. Coral is far more red than her lips red. If snow be white, why then her breasts are done?

**Speaker 0:** That was the late great Alan Rickman. And here's the last one. And repeatedly across the globe, girls tell me they find this one particularly attractive.

**Speaker 2:** The time will come when with elation, you will greet yourself arriving at your own door in your own mirror.

**Speaker 0:** Did you get it? That was Tom Hiddleston. And it doesn't matter if the girl is English or she's from Japan or she's American or she's French, many girls on dates when I say, look, Krauss Marischag or if you could nail a guy of a celebrity who would it be? They say Tom and I say why? And they say his voice, he could read out a shopping list and I would be horny. So there you go, not super aggressive like Liam Neeson perhaps, there's a warmth in them but there's characteristics that we'll talk about today that we can learn from, we can replicate. They were good examples, let's think of the opposite. Nice guy tells, Tom Torero twenty ten tells. These are common to most of my students. The nice guy voice is quiet. The nice guy voice is weak. The nice guy voice is apologetic or approval seeking, kind of the same thing. The nice guy voice is often feminine. The nice guy voice is passive. It's agreeable. It goes along with the female. She's holding the frame, he's inside her frame. What does the nice guy voice sound like? Often from the throat, often with that inflection, often from the mouth, sounds very timid, please like me, please don't hurt me. It's all from the nose, from the throat, not much going on in the rib cage, nothing going on in the diaphragm. We're gonna talk about all these things today. So let's break them down. How we can change our voice practically. Number one, let's look at projection, how you project your voice. So that's volume. No, that doesn't mean shouting, because as I said, a new teacher will typically shout and that will knacker your voice, you'll get laryngitis, you'll get a sore throat because you're trying to project from your voice, whereas singers know and public speakers know and actors know that a good voice, a rich voice, a sustainable voice comes from your diaphragm. That's roughly where your stomach is. So if you put your hand on your belly, you can try this, you can breathe in through your nose, take a nice long breath in through your nose. I can't do this and describe as well. Fill your abdomen, then your rib cage, then your throat and then breathe out slowly through your mouth. Try that again. In through the nose, feel your abdomen, then your ribs, then your throat. This is doctor Tom Torero. And then breathe out slowly through your mouth, keeping your hand on that stomach and there you can feel your abdomen working. This is what singers do. This is using your full lung capacity and this improves the projection of your voice. Okay? Public speakers do this as well as calming down, taking deep breaths before going on stage. A daygamer should do this before he goes out, you should do this before you go on a date, perhaps during the day you can go to the bathroom, you can take deep breaths or when she's talking, I know daygamers that breathe out slowly through their nose as the girl is talking, keeping your mouth closed, that stops you talking over her and it calms everything down, which we'll talk about pace in a minute. What else do I do? Karaoke. Okay. I'm a big fan of karaoke. You can have a few shots, have a few beers. It's an adventure bubble with a girl. You can sing a bit of karaoke. You can do it in a packed bar or you can do it Asian style in an enclosed room, a private room with your friends. Back at Oxford University when I was nerdy, would sing in the chapel choir. I was a bass singer. Singing definitely improves your voice and everybody says, well, I can't sing, I'm tone deaf blah blah blah blah blah, but okay, you can sing in the bathroom, you can sing in the shower, you can sing in the privacy of your own apartment, kitchen, whatever. Do some basic scale. Open your mouth, yawn, try to push your voice down, hold notes, do some arpeggios. Yeah you feel like a twat, I'm recording this, maybe thousands of people will listen to this, but hey, this is opening up your airways, singing from your diaphragm, singing from your rib cage, it's all good. Holding long notes, pushing it down, that will help with projection. Yep. You can do some diction exercises, that's enunciation and for this I need to grab a pencil. Hang on a second. Okay, I'm grabbing a pencil from a pot and I'm gonna say some tongue twisters with a pencil between my teeth. So I'll tell you the tongue twister first and then I'll put the pencil between my teeth and this will improve my pronunciation. It will improve the polish. So the first tongue twister says, a thin little boy picked six thick thistle sticks. Pencil between the teeth. A thin little boy picked six thick thistle sticks. The next one you can try says, Shelley flies through thick fog. Here it is with the pencil between the teeth. Sydney Shelley flies through thick fog. I sound like an idiot, but anyway, perhaps this is helping you. The last one says, this thatched roof is thick. Pencil between the teeth. Here we go. This thatched roof is thick and it automatically makes me pause between the words, it makes me give impact to each of those words, I'm thinking about the enunciation, very important as part of projection. Now, the disclaimer with projection is that volume is good but you still need some color. I've met daygame students who've had great volume but they've lacked color, so they've sounded robotic, they've sounded monotone like this. Hello. I just saw you. You look very nice. Oh, I'm yawning already. Yeah. It's boring. So especially for attraction, especially for the opener. I say open with love, open with feeling and then stacking and then vibing, there's got to be color in there. So for storytelling, there has to be animation. Delivery is vital for the teases, so they don't come across as hard necks. Watch that recent video I put on YouTube called the first ninety seconds. It's an infield video and you'll see this balance of projection, yes, but warmth and color, yes. Okay? Otherwise, if you say something and it comes across as offensive or as a neg, you've lost before you've even begun. Yeah? So it needs that warmth, it needs that color. Where does that come from? You could say in a game, because you have to love what you're doing, you have to love daygame, you have to love girls ultimately, you have to love the chase and that sparkle, that color, that warmth, comes through in your voice and people can recognize it. That's the difference between say Tom Hiddleston and Liam Neeson or Alan Rickman. Yeah, less sinister, more warmth. Okay. Time is ticking away. So let's talk about pitch. This is something I'm very aware of because I used to have a lot higher pitch in my voice and Americans are very guilty of this, Australians are very guilty of this. That's the upwards inflection at the end of their sentences. Making everything sound like a question. Excuse me, I just want to say something really quickly.

**Speaker 1:** I just saw you and you look really nice.

**Speaker 0:** You kind of look like an astronaut. Supplicating, sounds very needy, it sounds like you're seeking permission and specifically on the West Coast Of America, what do they call it, valley speak, that kind of up talk, combined with the filler words of, kind of like, you know, I was kind of like breaking tension, just filling silences with shit or even worse, mister nice guy, it's the agreeable filler words. Wow. Cool. Amazing. Oh my god. That's great. Me too. Wow. Let's get married. Please like me. Please like me. Oh my god. We're so similar. No, no, no, no, no. Okay? We break rapport before we make rapport. Attraction is created in the push, so teasing and challenging, making fun of her, role play. We can't agree with her with those supplicating words. But coming back to pitch, you can change it. The first step is being aware of it. The second step is pushing things down and this is quite literal. So record yourself and you could judge the pitch on a piano. Twenty twelve Tom Torero to twenty seventeen Tom Torero, big difference in pitch, especially after I stopped teaching kids, so it's something I'm aware of, something I try to control. Yes, recording yourself and listening to yourself is painful, it's embarrassing, use a dictaphone, use your mobile and some headphones around your neck and set with a microphone. Everybody cringes, every student cringes, but when you hear yourself, you go, oh my god, Jesus, I'm not going to do that again. It's the quickest way. I can nag you about your projection and your pitch and your pace and your persuasiveness but until you hear yourself, you're not going to change and through recording a 103, now a 104 podcasts, believe you me, I've had to change, right? Editing over fifty hours of stealth seduction down to seventeen hours, I had to listen to myself on the street, on dates, when the girl's back at mine, when I'm back at hers and you cringe. Pitch was one of the big things. So definitely, definitely, definitely be aware of it, eliminate that up talk, watch you're not going into the Mr Nice, excuse me, I just wanted to say you look really nice, what I noticed about you is you look very French. Okay, obvious when you record yourself, it's the first thing I listen to when a student sends me an infield for skype coaching, can be corrected, can be changed. Number three, something I'm trying to control today, that's the pace of how fast you speak and as I said for a podcast, I rattle on, but if you've seen me in a seminar or you've listened to Stealth Seduction, you'll realize I have a daygame voice, a presentation voice, a teaching voice, which is about half the speed, because in normal conversation, which is kind of like a podcast or you're with your mates down a pub, apparently that's about 400 words a minute, whereas in a formal speech or a YouTube video or a Tom Torero date seduction, that's about a 140 to a 180 words a minute, so quite literally half the speed and I record students and I say, do you think he was speaking slowly? And he says, yeah, that felt really weird, I don't normally speak like that, that was very slow. And I say, well, have a listen to this and it's still fast. So you might think you're speaking slowly but try to speak half the speed again. Okay? John Wayne used to say speak low, speak slow and don't say too much. That's a very seductive rule. Venue number one, you can have a bit more animation, bit more color in your voice as you're doing the storytelling, a bit of rapport, some spikes, you're still in there with the teasing but venue number two, when it's a lot more of the physical escalation and there's a lot more silence, you're doing the vacuum, you're letting her speak, you're going to be having a much slower, lower voice and you hear that quite literally on stealth seduction. So concentrate on the pace. Now I know it's a double edged sword because when you approach her, if you've seen that infield that I put on YouTube, the first ninety seconds, you're doing the work. So you kind of have to rattle on when you do the opener, you go direct, you tell her you like her and then I say, don't pause, go straight into the stack, and the stack is animated. And then when you get a topic, straight into the story for the vibing. And sure, once she's hooked, my mind is saying, Tom, shut the fuck up, vacuum, parrot, let her invest, slow your voice down. I'm thinking that in the second venue as well. Even though I'm enjoying the date, it's a double edged sword, I'm saying, Tom, shut the fuck up, less talking, more touching. You've done the verbal escalation into the physical escalation. Bring her in, whisper something in her ear, keep it low, keep it slow. These are things that I still consciously have to think about, seven years into this day game journey, so if I have to think about them, you certainly have to think about them and if I have to listen to myself recording all those infields, you should too. I say to many of my Skype students, you can teach yourself because the theory's out there, you've got stealth seduction, you've got street hustle or you've watched the free YouTube videos, you're listening to this podcast, just record yourself one or two sets a week, go home, have a tick list. What was your projection like? What was your pitch like? What was your pace like? Were there any filler words? And then all the classics, did you open direct? Did you stack properly? Did you get a topic to vibe on? When did she hook? Etcetera etcetera. Did you let her invest? Did you close strong? All these things you can teach yourself. Okay, to finish, because grandfather time is upon us, the bonus one, number four. That's how persuasive your voice is and every hustler needs to know this. Okay? I've said in many videos, own your words, even if you don't know what the fuck is going on, pretend, speak like, act like you know what the hell is going on. Alright? So be self assured, no hesitation, lead, lead, lead. So when you're doing a mini bounce to the side of the pavement or you're suggesting, let's go over here to this cafe just for ten minutes, I'm just gonna grab a quick coffee. Now when I point, often in a city I have no idea where the cafe is or where I'm going, but I say, look, that cafe down the road there, it serves amazing coffee. This is where I'm going, you should join me, let's go. It's conviction in your voice. Always better to be bolder than more timid, okay? If you're more bold, you can kind of scale it back but if you start off timid, you're lost, alright, so that's where that irrational self confidence comes from, you fake it till you make it, girls follow, girls are programmed to follow like puppies and classroom kids, yeah, whether that's on an eye day or you're bouncing back to yours. Something I spoke about in daygame three point zero is a little trick that I've been using recently not just for text pings or photo pings but I've been doing voice pings. So you can do this on Facebook Messenger audio or WhatsApp audio. Most messaging services let you do this. You press down record, you hold it down and you send her just a few seconds of your voice. Do it late at night when she's just about to go to bed so she hears your voice and it's so rare because we don't use phones for phoning anymore. Guys don't have the courage to do this. But before you do it, take some deep breaths, think about your projection, think about the pitch, think about the pace, think about your persuasiveness. And a little audio ping I might say, I've just seen your twin sister going into a twenty four hour off license. Oh my god, you're such an alcoholic. And then just hang up. Alright? Or a similar observation, something that's tailored to the situation. You might just want to do a bit of rapport but the fact that she hears your voice and it's low and it's slow but it's got a twinkle in it, it's got warmth in it, that's worth a million text pings or dozens and dozens of photo pings. Don't overdo it, you don't want send her 10 in a row or one every night, that's mister needy from mister scarcity, but just give it a go, drop in a voice ping and it's been working wonders for me. I discovered it in January, I think, when I was in South America, but I've been using it ever since. So there you go, that's combining persuasiveness to the pace and the pitch and the projection, that in itself is a tongue twister. But there you go, we are coming up to thirty minutes even though I've been trying to speak slowly. I hope that has given you some examples of how to improve your voice. We shall finish with a bit more of the great Tom Hiddleston because girls keep banging on about this guy. They wanna bang him because of his voice. So I will leave the end of the podcast to another Tom. This is Tom Hiddleston.

**Speaker 2:** Einstein's theory of relativity is e equals m c squared. This means that energy equals mass times the speed of light squared. The Pythagorean equation is a squared plus b squared equals c squared. It's impossible to know the exact value, but pi is approximately 3.1415926535897936.