---
title: Episode 188 Static vs Nomadic Daygame
episode_number: 188
era: late
source_file: Episode 188 Static vs Nomadic Daygame.mp3
audio_size_mb: 53.7
duration_sec: 1759.3
duration_min: 29.3
language: en
provider: deepgram
model: nova-3
diarized: true
confidence: 0.996
transcribed_at: 2026-05-27T17:10:31Z---

# Episode 188 Static vs Nomadic Daygame

**Speaker 0:** Podcast a 188 introduced by the gravelly melancholic, you could say dulcet tones of Lee Marvin singing one of my dad's favorite tunes, I was born under a wandering star and that is fitting for today's episode and also for what I've been doing for the last week and my project this year. This podcast is on static versus nomadic daygame. Is it better to pick up girls in one place over a long period of time or to be like me, a hobo, a gypsy, and to continue moving? What are the pros? What are the cons? We shall talk about that. I'm here recording this, broadcasting this from Scandinavia. I haven't really gone too far north in Scandinavia, but I've made it through The UK to The Netherlands to Germany to Denmark from Copenhagen across into Svenska. Part is Svenska. I'm in Sweden before once again going and doing my daygame in Russia. So this year, I am a bit like a farmer. I'm in one place after the agricultural revolution of the project this year. I've decided to just do my day game in one place. Whereas for all the other stuff, I'm still traveling. And for previous years, all my day game was nomadic. So hence the topic of today. Anyway, before we go into that, two requests. One about being on a podcast and one about being in the black sheep bandit series two. For the podcast, I'm looking for somebody who's over the age of 60. So no fibbing if you're 55, you're a young man. It's been my dream to meet a daygamer or a seducer, a bachelor, someone who's got mojo, who's seducing women in his sixties, seventies, maybe beyond. I don't know how old these women are that you're picking up, maybe they're in their forties, their fifties. You naughty boy, maybe they're in their thirties. And crucially, it's not pay for play. So you're not just going on a big whoring trip, good on you if you are but I'm talking about genuine seduction and if it's cold approach, even better. I mean you're not meeting this woman at a tea dance or something. If that's you, I would love to have you on a podcast before episode 200. So email me Tom@TomTorero.com. Once again, you gotta be over the age of 60. The second thing, would you like to be in series two of the black sheep bandit? In episode one, I filmed a very nice Irishman called Johnny. He took me on his canal boat in Hertfordshire and he just described the boat and his living costs and what he does for work and how he has all this free time to travel and do what the fuck he wants. So once again, a middle finger up to normality. Is that you? Are you also a misfit? Maybe you're a wandering nomad, maybe you're a poker player, maybe you're a surfer, maybe you're a pilot, maybe you've got a live aboard yacht, maybe you are a naughty boy and you're a hustler of a different kind and we can hide your identity, you can be, in the shadows, whatever. The logistics I don't know because I'm travelling, perhaps you're travelling but if our paths cross and you're a black sheep bandit, I'm not really for this talking about daygame because presumably listening to this we're all black sheep bandits in terms of our street seduction, how we meet women, not on Tinder, not in bars and clubs, not through work or friend of friend. We do this odd thing, daytime cold approach, pickup. Okay. That's pretty maverick. But in your lifestyle, so if you don't work in an office, if you don't have a boss breathing down your neck, if you don't have a mortgage, if you don't have the wife and 2.4 kids and you've said fuck it, get in touch. Once again, tom tomtorero dot com. Okay. Should you travel for your day game or should you remain in one place? Should you be the static farmer which evolved after the hunter gatherer? We got into property ownership, we got into the monogamy contracts quite literally, the static farmer, that's how marriage came about. Or should we go back to the nomadic transient hunter gatherer? But in terms of just being in one place, one city, that's how I started. If you read my first book daygame, it's pretty much 99% all in London from 2019 to 2013 I think. Just daygaming in London. So collecting lots of leads and dating in London. Sure, the girls came from different backgrounds, English girls, American girls, Canadian girls, Australian girls, whatever. Then from late twenty thirteen until the beginning of this year, I was just traveling and daygaming. I kept moving. Sometimes I'd go back to cities I'd been to that I loved but I was keen to try new places. I would stay in a place for a week or ten days or two weeks. Occasionally I'd stay there for a month. I did over 50 countries and it this year has been the first year since London when I've stopped that. I've said, okay, all my day game this year is gonna be in one Russian city and it feels very odd. Where are we now? We're at the end of March. So the first quarter done but I've got itchy feet, I'm already a bit bored of that city and that one type of girl. I'm already thinking as I'm driving the van, well I could stop off and do a bit of day game here but then I'm thinking no, the idea of the van is to have a break from day game. We shall come on to that as well but it's hard. It's hard for me to just do one city. Does it produce better results? Did I get better results when I was traveling? Well, I would say definitely. The first tip is if you're starting out doing your day game just learn it in one city. Go to your nearest big city if you live in a small town or even a small city. Go to a big city where you can be nice and anonymous, get your 100, 200, 500, a thousand cold approaches done and it's much easier learning this stuff, riding that roller coaster of emotions if you're in one place. Lots of advantages then to static day game. Home turf knowledge. So both for your farming, that means you know the daygame areas, you know the universities and the train stations and the parks, you even know the temperatures and the seasons and the busiest time of the day in the week, all that stuff you know. And then secondly, as I said, you know your date venues. So obviously you know where you live I hope, unless you live in a van which keeps moving. So you know your cafes and you know your venue one bars and you know your venue two bars and you might know some other cheeky venues if you need to throw them in. That's all sorted. When I was in London, as I say in the first book, I was like a black cab driver, a London cabbie. We say he has to take this thing called the knowledge. And it's a test which he has to prepare for for about two, three years I think where he rides around London on a moped. He's not allowed to use satnav and he has to learn set routes around London and landmarks, places, quickest route and he comes to know every train station, every museum, every theater, every hotel, a lot of bars and restaurants and that's what a daygamer does. By the end of my apprenticeship in London, I had a very very detailed detailed knowledge of London. So that's very good. Bachelor pad logistics are also sorted. So you've got your excuse for her to come back. You've set up your apartment correctly. You can watch all this on YouTube. The lighting is correct. Correct, the music is ready, you've got your little mini bar, you've got your shisha, you've got your guitar, everything sorted and before you go out for a day game session if you're looking for same delays or obviously your date, it's all set up, bounces super easy so you don't need to panic, you don't need to think about hotels or hostels or airbnbs or supermarkets, it's all sorted. That leads us on to not having to rush the pools. So just like this year in Russia, I might number collect, go on one date and then I leave Russia and go back to the van life. Come back to Russia, I might have a second date then because it's Russia, I might go into a third date. Obviously, with progression, with escalation, we're not going into the friend zone, but I can take my time. It's no big deal if you don't get the bang on the first date. Whereas when I was traveling, especially if you're in a place for a weekend, a long weekend, five days, you're really over pulling, you're going for fast escalation, you're going for the bounce back as quickly as you can. And if you don't get it, you're frustrated, you've perhaps gone too far, you've burnt the bridges and you don't see her again and it's like a smash and grab. It's like lots and lots of bank robberies consecutively and it's tiring. The roller coaster is absolutely massive but with static day game, you can take your time which is ideal for a beginner. I'm glad I learned just in London when I used to God, when I was shit at escalation, I used to go on four dates, five dates. I was doing it in boyfriend mode but, it taught me lots and lots of things. If you're in one place, you can have repeat bangs. So it's not pump and dump. You can sleep with a girl. And then if the sexual chemistry is good, you're not pretending to be her boyfriend, but you can be friends with benefits, you can see her once a week, you can keep plates spinning which is a mini harem or a harem. At the same time, if you're in one place reduces those player vibes. If you're if you're just traveling, if you're just nomadic, if you're riding into town and, doing a bit of day game, going for fast pulls, you reek of being a player. So obviously you get more token last minute resistance, Her anti slut defenses go up. Whereas if you're in one place for your daygame or I say to the girls in Russia, I'm here a lot. I come and go but you know I'm going to be here for at least half of this year. You can see that ASD, the anti select defense come down right before your eyes and because you're going on more dates or you're, going for the seven hour rule as Mystery would say, on average you're from meet to close it's somewhere in the five to seven hour mark. That reduces the LMR. So in a way there's more comfort. It's not slipping into boyfriend but it makes things easier certainly than the fast one hour pull or same day lay. And finally, in one city, if you want, you're going to have access to wings. Guys that can dig in with you if the city is big enough obviously like London or Sydney or New York or Chicago, there's going to be other guys to dig in with. You can have regular friends, I hope, to do non daygame things with. Shokkari, you might even have a friend who's a girl who you slept with one or two years ago or like me, might even have a friend who's a lesbian and you can actually go for a normal drink. If she's a lesbian you'll probably be still perving at other girls as we do looking at boobies and ass but it's nice. No sexual tension because you're not going to sleep with her, she's a lesbian or you already have slept with her. Then there's the case for having female friends. But what am I saying? I'm just saying you can surround yourself with non game or game if you want but I'd say it's better to have non game friends which makes your life a lot more balanced, a lot easier. So there are the pros of static day game and all those pros apply to me this year in Russia. But what are the cons? I've already said, well, I'm already bored. If you're like a wandering nomad and suddenly you stop, you're going to feel frustrated. I feel bored of the city, of the date venues, as I said bored of that particular type of girl because they're all Russian. The daygame approach is quite Groundhog Day ish. The topics on the day are quite Groundhog Day ish. Whereas if you're in London meeting lots of different types of girls from different countries that can shake things up or like last year in the van when I was daygaming back to back to back to back in lots and lots of different cities and countries. Every different country and city has its flavor so that wakes you up. I will come on to the pros of traveling but anyway, boredom, monotony, complacency, that's an interesting one. It's only the end of March and already as I mentioned last week because I've got some girls on the go and because it's been cold and because I've been dead game in for a long time I just think, oh, well, you know, the spark, the joy of arriving in this city that's worn off. I might as well just stick with what I've got. You know what I mean? And you get soft mentally, you get soft physically. It's like slipping into the boyfriend thing or a married bloke who just gives it all up and you think that that life of comfort is going to be good for you but quickly you realize that what's the opposite of a player? As I've said before, the opposite of a player is a spectator. So you're sitting on your fat lardy ass and some guys even go from that to being a grumpy old man, know, moaning and whining and harking for the good old days when he used to pick up girls and now just being grumpy because you're not. So that's a danger with just being in one place and getting bored of doing daygame there. You get lazy with your opening, that's part of the complacency and also with the closing because you lack urgency. So although I said it's good to slow dating down, without that time limit, without that gun to my head as I say, I might think well I don't need to you know try that much, my text game doesn't need to be that good, I don't need to escalate that smoothly on the day because I can always have another shot in a few weeks time. That's not necessarily a good thing. It can make you sloppy and I have in Russia not approach anxiety but I have approach apathy. Well sure, one guy asked me Tom do you still get approach anxiety? Yes, in the sense that it's that slight nervousness, that butterfly feeling in your belly but it's completely different to how a guy that's never done daygame would feel. I feel it but then rather than an excitement I just think, oh I can't be bothered. Not because I'm scared of the girl but I'm thinking, Well, I know my stats, I know that she might well flake, I know that she might come on a date and then we might not fuck. I've got other girls, what's the point? And that's worse when you've done a lot of day game and you're actually good at day game than if you're just a beginner and you're like a puppy dog and you use that approach anxiety, that tingling as fuel and you're so excited to be running around talking to girls. I didn't have the apathy or the complacency or the boredom in London for those first few years. I was so excited. So if you've done date game for less than a couple years this doesn't apply to you but I'm just saying it's a long term downside to being in one place. Another downside I've already said is the similarity of the girls if it's not a mixed international city like London or New York. So in Russia, in this particular city, all the girls basically look the same, they act the same, they're kind of into the same things. There's variations of course but I'm not meeting, you know, busty Brazilians and mysterious African girls and short awkward Asian girls and a spectrum of European girls. No, I'm just generally meeting Russian girls. They look the same and okay, that's my type but, once you've been in a sweet shop and had lots of different sweets and then you you can only eat one thing, you feel it immediately and you crave all those other types. So I'm looking at the world map thinking, oh god, love a bit of Argentina, I'd love to go back to, South Africa, I'd love to try this, I'd love to try that but I have to say no. I've said I'm gonna settle for this year, not settle down but settle on this project and that's what I'm gonna do. Another con, if you're in one place as I'm finding and you're spinning plates and you've got some girls, have to be very careful not to slip into the boyfriend box with boyfriend vibes because you're breaking lover rules. Watch that YouTube video on lover rules and maybe she sleeps over, maybe you see her more than once a week, maybe you text her too much and quite quickly it's not monogamous boyfriend but there's boyfriend girlfriend vibes. So that can happen especially if you combine it with the complacency and the non urgency so you're not approaching as much. You got to be very careful not to give off the boyfriend vibes. Anyway, those were the pros and the cons of being in one place and like I said, it's only the end of March and already I'm thrashing around like a fish on dry land. It's not my environment to be daygaming in one place. I'm longing for a bit more daygame wandering. But anyway, let us move on to traveling daygame. And the pro tip for this is really once you're competent with being able to get over your approach anxiety, open girls, get numbers, go on dates and sleep with just a handful of girls. Once you're competent with your skill set, so certainly a few 100 approaches then spread your wings and hit the road to a nearby city. As I've said before, go for a weekend to a nearby country if you're in Europe. Just try a little trip and then make your missions longer and longer and longer. The sign of a really experienced daygamer of a super solid seducer is that he can pick up girls all over the world with different types of ethnicity, different situations, different cities, different vibes. He's not just picking up one type of girl like Groundhog Day. That shows a real spectrum of seduction abilities. If you can pick up a girl in South America and you can pick up a girl in North America, in Europe, in Africa, in Asia, different ages, different backgrounds, different vibes, party girls, serious girls, academic girls, professional girls, milfs, whatever. You're really testing your skill set. You're testing your sexual market value quite literally across lots and lots of different sexual market places which should fill you with confidence because you know you could be dropped into pretty much any big city around the world all alone with no Tinder, no social circle, no bars or clubs and you could within a week or so be dating and then sleeping with a girl. So that's good to have. All right, the pros of traveling. You are traveling. You are seeing the world. There is that excitement. There is that buzz of arriving in a place and getting stuck in. There's that new energy which which boosts your vibe and you get an upward spiral of results. And a new country, it's always a novelty or a new city in that country, it's always novel. Gives you that zest for life, that zest for approaching. You get the different types of girls as we just spoke about. You can find the ones you click with somewhere around the world is an ethnicity of girl that really clicks with your look or your type or your persona. Some guys do better in one country than another. Don't listen to what you read on the internet, go and try it and you find the girls you like but still you can be like that kid in the sweet shop tasting all the different types of sweets. You can get good at fast pulls. You can get good at same day lays, fast escalation. Why? Because you have to. That's the gun to the head. If you're only in town for three days, you're not going to be going on three or four dates. Fuck. You have to learn how to go for the instant date, go for the bounce home, try to pull her on the first date, schedule more than one girl on the same day. So it definitely improves your skill set like talking to different types of girls. And therefore, vis a vis, you will develop a solid lover frame where you will learn how to come and go, how to cut and run. You don't get trapped in monogamy, you don't certainly give off the boyfriend vibe especially if you're living in a van. The right frame is set at the start and you're the lover, you're the, pirate, you're the cat. You give her experiences rather than investment. So, lovers give experiences, providers give investment and that's exactly what you want to be as a daygamer as a long term bachelor. You're also a man of mystery. Girls love this and I found this breathing space when I leave Russia every few weeks and leave the girls and don't text them as much, that breathing space is very good. It fuels the mystery and I think it's to do with the intermittent reinforcement. I've spoken about that before but I disappear. Their interest is spiked because of scarcity, power of the push and it helps when I come back to close another time. I've got a quote here from Iceberg Slim on being a mystery. We'll go into this on another podcast but he says, a pimp has to know all his whores but cannot let them know him. Even if you've got 20 whores, he says, your thoughts must be secret. Never get too friendly with a whore. That's how you keep a whore, how you keep yourself a mystery. No, I'm not saying you have to be a pimp. I'm saying that principle applies, it's universal. And traveling, coming back to the pros of traveling, that helps exactly with being a man of mystery. If you come and go and then return to the city, there's no way she's gonna think you're the boyfriend. Alright. The cons of traveling. Why was it tough from the end of twenty thirteen all the way up until the end of twenty eighteen? Well, you're left with lots and lots of open loops. You're getting loads of phone numbers, going on a few dates and then leaving town. That's what we mean by open loops. And if you want to go back to that city therefore you have to do pretty elaborate boring long game where you're messaging her for weeks and months over social media and you automatically slip into boyfriend if you're chatting with her on social media every evening, good night, good morning all this time and then you go back to the city and you're kind of in that boyfriend mode or even worse you go back to the city and you don't end up sleeping with that girl that that's a huge time sink and, it's a trap, a one eye to see kind of trap going to a city just for one girl. So open loops, they're a fucking nightmare. No daygamer likes open loops. You know the pain of doing some day game and then traveling hundreds if not thousands of miles back to your city or another city and you're sitting there in your pants and ding, your phone goes off and it's a message from a girl you met two months ago and perhaps she's out and she's drunk and she says, where are you or want to meet or I'm outside your apartment and you feel like saying, well, you're three months too late love. What else? Being on tilt. I've mentioned this in other podcasts where if you're continually continually, that's correct. You can tell I'm a bit sleepy. Too much driving. If you're continually turning up in new cities with no leads, you're not using Tinder, you don't have a social circle, you're not doing salsa or whatever, well you're in scarcity. So you're kind of a bit desperate which you have to hide. In poker they say you're on tilt so you're making poor decisions because of your neediness. That happens if you're travelling all the time. I've already said the come and go rapid fire in and out thing can backfire. The player vibes will be too much and for some girls she'll just say no. She might not be looking for a boyfriend but she doesn't want to be pumped and dumped. So that's the backfiring of the player vibes. I've made a video on that how you can counteract that. And some wider things to finish. What about the strains of travel? Not to mention jet lag but just moving continually, moving apartments, changing time zones, changing climates, different money, different language. It's all very destabilizing, lack of a routine, you get the loneliness, you get the dark nights of the soul if you're spending too much time on your own. Unhealthy lifestyle is often part of a traveling wandering nomad daygamy. You think you're on holiday a lot, always a new place. So you might be drinking too much, overeating. Oh, the hard life of a traveling daygamer. Woe is me. But anyway, we are coming up to half an hour. I've given you a balanced account of the pros and cons of traveling versus static. Once again, I say start with static and then move on to traveling not forever, not for a crazy long period of time like me but you can have your cake and eat it. You can have a base and then you can go off on trips and that's exactly what I'm doing this year with the van. Videos that accompany this are in the blog post which is linked below on YouTube. So there's one on why daygaming abroad is hard filmed in Tallinn many years ago. There is the daygame groundwork video if you're doing a mission that's from The Ukraine. There's And a video from South America called Is Solo Day Game Travel Lonely? So how to find a bit more of a balance if you're going away for a long period of time perhaps without a wing. How can you stop yourself jumping off a cliff? But we shall leave it there. I'm going to bed or I will edit this upload it and then go to bed. That's my dedication to you dear listener. But let us finish with a little bit more of Lee Marvin. Until next week, keep grabbing life by the horns. Goodbye. When I get to heaven, tie me to a tree or I'll begin to roam and soon you know where I will be.