---
title: Episode 32 Stripped Down Daygame
episode_number: 32
era: early
source_file: Episode 32 Stripped Down Daygame.mp3
audio_size_mb: 57.9
duration_sec: 1897.2
duration_min: 31.6
language: en
provider: deepgram
model: nova-3
diarized: true
confidence: 0.998
transcribed_at: 2026-05-27T17:15:25Z---

# Episode 32 Stripped Down Daygame

**Speaker 0:** Tom Torero, podcast 32. Hello from rainy Poland. Hello to all our Polish brothers. Once more I find myself in can we say Central Europe? This is Central Europe. It's not really Eastern Europe, is it? No. I'm dad used to get really offended when I used to say Prague was Eastern Europe. And if you look at a map, Prague is further west I think, than Vienna. Anyway, there you go. We're in Poland, and I'm not alone. Another comrade on the road is joining me for this podcast. We are sheltering from the rain. It's not ideal daygame conditions, which gives us a nice weasel opportunity to sit and drink even more coffee and discuss how it's going. But it's nice to see this mystery guest again because I taught you, mystery guest, a lot more than a year ago, almost two years ago. How long was it?

**Speaker 1:** A year and eight months ago.

**Speaker 0:** That's a long time ago. And I've seen you at various times, bits and bobs all the way through, but this is the first time I've really caught up with what you're doing and where you've been traveling and how your game is. And we we had a chat, and I realized that what we were talking about your where you're at now, what you're going through, what you were telling me, all those funny stories, they point to one sticking point, if you like, which is also still my sticking point, which is a lot of daygamers sticking points. And that is doing too much. That is enjoying games so much, having learned so much game, knowing so many techniques and good stories and implementing so many things that in England, the I think the idiom is over egging the pudding. I still really don't know what that means. I guess that means putting too many eggs into your into your delicious pudding, making it too sweet. So that's what we're gonna talk about today. Less is more. But first of all, I gotta introduce you. It's like a talk show, mate, because guys are going, who the hell is this? So the mystery guest is Richard. Alright, Richard. Hey. How's it going? Good, man. You're based in The UK, but you do lead quite a nomadic life, don't you? You've been on the road for pleasure and for daygam.

**Speaker 1:** Yeah. For the most part, travel has been an integral part of my lifestyle ever since I was a kid. So even before I I discovered daygame, I've always enjoyed meeting new people and discovering new cultures.

**Speaker 0:** And before that, where, how, were, how were you meeting girls, social situations, work, college?

**Speaker 1:** Well, quite frankly, before I discovered daygame, I basically just kissed a single girl beforehand. And it was, again whilst traveling traveling around. So yeah. And general daygame has been my one and only source of girls, and I'm quite happy about it. Can I ask how old you are? I'm 22.

**Speaker 0:** 22. So great case study for lots of listeners. Similar background, backstory about, you know, kissing that one girl, getting into daygame a year and eight months ago. I obviously I see massive differences because I haven't really seen you in action or heard your stories for a year and eight months since that weekend when we trained together. So clearly, things are going well. Things are on the up. There's not really been a day here where I haven't seen you going on a date or you're on dates, multiple dates. You're a date tonight. You're on a date yesterday. You've got numbers in your phone. You're going through completely different sticking points now to a year and eight months ago, yes? Do you want to what's been going on in that year and eight months?

**Speaker 1:** Well, in that that year and eight months, I started gaining my first few successes in daygame. Then they started becoming more common. And now, for example, I'm in a situation where the last, say, two to three dates that I've gone on, the girl has basically escalated on me. I've I've taken too long to escalate, and then they go for the kiss at the end of the date, or they're very heavily hinting at the fact that they want to be kissed. For example, this one girl, she told me well, I asked her, what's the story of your first kiss? And then she told me this story about going on a party and coming back with a guy. She was around 15 at the time. And then she was supposedly so happy at the fact that the guy had walked her home that she kissed him. Hint hint? Hint hint. Exactly. So we continued talking, and then she looks at her watch and says, I do have to get going, and I have to catch my train, but you can walk me there. Hint hint. Nudge nudge. Wink wink. Exactly. So, basically, it happened without me having to escalate at all, which I think, again, does come to the issue that I'm not doing enough in terms of escalation because I'm sort of focusing too much on the game aspect of it rather than just putting my balls on the line and escalating.

**Speaker 0:** Yep. It's coming down to efficiency, isn't it? It's coming down to recognizing the window and having the balls to pull the trigger, which is intermediate advanced sticking point because, obviously, to get to that point, you have to have gills in front of you on a regular basis. But when you told me all those stories and you told me about that sticking point, that's a great that's a it's a nice place to be in, isn't it really? It's better than having the AA running out of things to say and not having enough material. From chatting to you and other guys have listened to you on dates and things. You clearly have enough material. I mean, you know game theory. You know that all the tactics in the book. You implement storytelling, cocky phony, push pull. You've got escalation ladders. You know about physical escalation. You know all this stuff. Yeah? And on the street, I'm sure you know inside out your spiel because you've said it thousands of times. But now it's that principle of taking bits away, isn't it? Stripping it down. We said it's like or you said it's like those old cheesy kung fu movies where you've got like a giant enemy and you've got this tiny little Japanese man with one blow just taking him out, you know, David and Goliath style. I remember a story from listeners might know Jeff Thompson, martial arts instructor, or he'd like to be probably remembered as the doorman, the author of watch your back or watch my back. And he said in real fighting, I street fighting, and he was a doorman in Coventry, really rough part of England. He said, forget your martial arts, forget your waving around and complicated moves and your textbook. He said, to punch, punch hard, learn to knock out. The rest in a kebab shop is just a backup. And that's really what we're getting to here with game. Taking things away less is more. Because when you say to a beginner, oh, less is more, you know, dial it down, vacuum, don't you don't need any stories. Just pull her home. That's pretty useless advice. Yeah. If if I if we were talking about this a year and eight months ago.

**Speaker 1:** Yeah. Absolutely. I think giving certain advice to a newbie is counterproductive. For example, the dates like, two weeks ago, I went on several dates, and I kept hearing the phrase, you're one of the most interesting people that I've ever met or you're absurdly funny. They kept clutching their stomachs because they couldn't laugh much more. And I never heard from them again because I was overinvesting. I wasn't allowing them to to take part into in the story because, again, seduction is a dance. You do some of the work, and then she has to do some of the work as well in equal measure. If you do all the work, she'll be like, wow. What an extraordinary guy. But she will have no way of putting you into her life. She'll have no way of picturing you together, so nothing will end up happening.

**Speaker 0:** But it's so frustrating because you're like, oh, I've got this great story that I've learned, tested. I've already tried this on the last date, and it it worked. I've got this DHV story, or got this really clever kiss gambit. My game's good. You know? I've spent a year learning all this all this stuff, and it it does work. And it's very hard then to say, well, actually, we're gonna we're gonna start taking it off you. We're gonna we're we're gonna have you sitting there in silence. We're gonna make your dates not two hours, but forty five minutes. No. You can't have two venues. You're gonna bounce it. And you're like, what? This is get this is against all my learnings. A good what was that lay story you told me? Your I think it was your first lay. Classic over egging of the pull the trigger pudding. Can you tell that story?

**Speaker 1:** Yeah. It was about a year ago, and the thing is I was in Budapest. It was my last day that I was there. So I'd had two dates on that day. The first one didn't go all that well. Well, it it was promising, but you could clearly see that it was gonna need more time. So I went to the second date, And it started going very well. She laughed at my jokes. She held my hand. Then I had this look from her coming at the restaurant. I sort of already instinctually knew that she would sleep with me on that day. Yeah. But the thing is, I sort of didn't quite believe it that. So I said, well, let's go to the second venue. So I knew that she liked jazz, so I seeded it and told her, like, let's go to a jazz venue. I didn't tell her that it was near my place, but she agreed, so we started walking. Then on the street where my apartment was, we kissed. And then it was such a good kiss that I completely lost track of where I was, and they kept walking. And they missed the turn on the street where the venue was. So rather than turning back and going to the venue, I sort of said like, fine. I'll double down on my bet and take her directly to my house. So I arrived at the door, and I told her like, look, I did legitimately lose track of where we were, but we could listen to jazz at my place. She agreed, and we went up. And then I take her to my room, and I generally actually start opening up the laptop to put jazz music on. And she's sitting on my bed with a dumbfounded look like, what the fuck is going on here? Yeah. And then I realized that it was on. It was clearly on the and the that I was overdoing it. Yeah. So I turned the lap laptop back off, and I sit on the bed with her, and we start kissing and making out quite heavily. And then afterwards, no last minute resistance whatsoever. And I still wanted to go on over an hour of dates before I realized that she was already quite interested. And didn't you say you asked her afterwards,

**Speaker 0:** when did you know? And here's the shocking bit. When did she know that she wanted to to get laid?

**Speaker 1:** She told me that she already knew by the point that I'd kiss her. When I kissed her, she said she knew for a fact that she wanted to go to bed with me. Yeah. And, again, I I thought that I wanted well, I thought that the best thing to do was to go on an hour long date after that. Yeah. Yeah. It's it's

**Speaker 0:** almost like there's two levels to what's going on because when you get into it, like I said, it would be useless advice to say to you, go with your gut instinct, pull fast, just see who is wanting to get laid, you know, go for it, abandon the rule book. Because when you started, you need you need that you need a structure, you need a model, you need to know your venues, you need to know your timings, kiss close gambit, seeding gambit, bounce back in gambit. She's in your flat. This is an interesting one. Guys email me and say, what seduction movie should I have? What should I watch with a girl? And on a on a logical man level, that's a logical question. You know? Or what CD is the best for seduction? Or what type of wine gets the girl home the best? But you forget she knows. On some level, she knows what's happening. And have I ever watched, more than twenty minutes of the movie and then kicked it shut with my foot? That's that's all it is. The the movie doesn't matter. You know what I mean? The guy's overthinking it. He's honestly thinking that he's somehow tricking the girl back into the apartment.

**Speaker 1:** In fact, actually picking a boring movie can actually be a boon because the girl will focus on you more than the actual movie. And she knows she knows what apartment and movie means. Exactly. It's sort of like why the there's the joke of let's go watch Netflix and chill. That's the I love that meme. Well, I'll put that on Facebook. That's a great new meme.

**Speaker 0:** Proof of concept. What's the what's the the instant date you had with that girl who said you made her feel like ice cream? It's another example of the window closing and you missing the window.

**Speaker 1:** Yeah, again, this was like a year ago. And it was the first time that I genuinely thought I had a chance. And so we went on an instant date. We held hands. She looked at me very, very strongly. And then she said the phrase, when you look at me, I feel like ice cream when I'm out on a hot day. That was the first time that I'd ever gotten that sort of response from someone. And it generally did excite me. But the thing is, I sort of tried to play it safe to the point where she was like, right. We should watch a movie, knowing full well what that meant. She said that. She said that. And so we agreed on a day, like, two days later or a day later. She even said, like, oh, I'm gonna bring the wine, and it's gonna be great. Uh-huh. Yes. Exactly. As in I thought it was completely on. But the thing is what I failed to realize at at that point is that there is a window of opportunity. If you see the opening, if you see that a girl is interested in you, you should kiss kiss her. I've heard the phrase, by the point where you think that you should kiss her, you should have kissed her ten minutes ago. Too late. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Awesome. Sometimes too late. And the ending of that story was there was no sweet love making? There was no sweet love making. I'd never saw her ever again because I didn't pull the trigger. Because to a certain extent, I don't think it's conscious, but I think at a subconscious level, girls do not respect someone who doesn't pull the trigger when they open themselves to that. It's also that, but it's also I on a biological level, I think cycles of their hormones

**Speaker 0:** that you caught that girl. You know, she jellified and spazzed out and you made her feel like ice cream. I'd put money on that being the middle of her cycle or somewhere around there. And then what do you know? Couple of days later or even one day later or a week later, you just miss it. And she's gone back to the boyfriend or she's gone back home or she's in a grumpy mood or she's in a non sexual mood. And men, we find it difficult to empathize with this because we're basically always horny. But women definitely have. I've just released something on my YouTube channel called inside the secret society where I interview this girl after delay, and she says exactly that. She's like, at certain times of the month, I walk around shopping malls hoping guys will fuck me. And she she couldn't explain why, but it's interesting. And that window's there. Coming back to the point of this podcast, we overegg it. We are waiting. I'm saying we because it's definitely still my sticking point. But most guys, this is their sticking point. I rarely meet a guy who overestimates. We're waiting for a green light, yeah, or a strong amber. Red, obviously, we both say, okay. Like last night, I finished a date with a girl who was just red. It was not on. But the orange ones, where, like you said, like, you went on one last night with and she had a bit of a poker face. And you're going, should I should I not play it safe? Well, last night, had to get the bus, didn't she? Your one. But if you look back on all those opportunities you had, all those instant dates, all those girls who spazzed out on the street, think about how far you will make it have pushed that. You know? Yeah. Exactly. As in again, with the girl yesterday, I thought, like, I'll play it safe. I won't escalate more more than I've

**Speaker 1:** had because she said that she wanted to meet me on Tuesday. But the thing is, I walked her to the bus station, and then she turns to me and kisses me. So that's the thing. As in, I think we're vastly underestimating how far we should we ought to go. I think because we sort of fear the label of creepy. I think that's a major sticking point in most guys because we just don't want to be labeled as creepy. But the thing is, what we forget is that there's two sides of the coin. On the one side, the same action that can be called creepy to a girl in a certain state of mind can be called sexy. But the same girl, if you catch her in the wrong mood, all of a sudden will say that it's creepy. So to a certain extent, yes, it depends a lot on your ability. But you have to take the shot and sort of and polarize them and see whether they're actually receptive to your approaches.

**Speaker 0:** But to get to that point, you have to have the fundamentals down. You know what I mean? This is really an intermediate to an advanced podcast, you could say. And then none of this is valuable unless you've got the model down. You're comfortable with getting the number and then making it a solid number and then getting her because you're gonna be burning too many things, taking too high risks. So like, you know, you've you've had your successes and you've been in it long enough now where you can say, okay, rather than a machine gun, which is that enthusiastic daygamer just going mental and firing like every trick in the book. What I've said I need to do and what you need to do is to learn just to be a sniper. From here on in, you have to make your game as efficient as possible, which is stripping off all the fat, limiting your bullets, reducing your time, reducing your expenditures. You said your investment and my investment, you know? A good example, even now, a few days ago, I I had a first date with a girl. No. This was second date. Was this first date? This was second date. And instinctively, thought, right. This is delay because the first date had been good. It had been quick, but good. So I'd come up with a bit of an elaborate plan. We were gonna go along the river and then go to the park and then back to mine because it was the middle of the day. And she turned up, and what did she say to me when she turned up up there? She she yawned and went, ugh, I'm so tired. Retrospect, she was saying, you know, probably now pull the trigger now. But I carried on with my plan. You know, went along the river, lay in a park, probably waited even then too long for the kiss, and then finally took her home. That could have, in hindsight, probably been done in ten minutes. But, again, it's that thing in me going, I don't wanna risk it. I don't wanna don't wanna play that high stakes poker. A psychologist might say to me now that it's no longer fear of failure with you and me. It's that weird fear of success. And I used to think that was bullshit. How can you have fear of success? That sounded ridiculous. But the more I do this, the more I think that could well be true that you think shit. I'm gonna just play it safe because this is comfortable and it's worked in the past. But if you knew that it was way more possible, that kind of screws with your mind because that affects this lovely little daygame model that we've learned, doesn't it? Know what I mean? It's a bit of a, like, a weird new reality level.

**Speaker 1:** Yes. And to a great extent, we use the model as a shield. We are somewhat unwilling to actually test our own metal by putting ourselves out there. So we always go into the comfort of, no. No. Oh, no. I still have to go through two venues because that model says this even though you can sense that. You can see that it's there. Because otherwise, if if it works without the model, then all of a sudden, how come you got to this point in the first place? Your reality starts shattering. So to a certain extent, yes, I I completely agree that it is fear of success because all of a sudden you're it's sort of like as if you were climbing a pair of stairs, and then all of a sudden you look back and you realize that the stairs were nonexistent in the first place. Yeah.

**Speaker 0:** A necessary thing, you know, crutches or stabilizers. What did you say about economics? There's a thing in economics about not always doing more, producing more. Yeah.

**Speaker 1:** A lot of things that one thing that a lot of people do when they start a new business or they start a new company is they they're like, well, I'm gonna produce as much as humanly possible for as little cost as possible. But the thing is, oftentimes, they miss the point. The point is you have to you have to reach the point where supply meets demand. If you continue supplying it, a, you're losing money, b, you're devaluing your own product by supplying way too much of it. So overall, you might be at a better profit margin just by producing less quantity

**Speaker 0:** because people will appreciate it more. Okay. Well, let's get give some practical examples. Guys listen to this going, okay. How can I simplify my game? Let's talk about the vacuum. Right? Do you wanna give an example of why as a beginner that would be a disaster? But why now, when you know how to do it, it's genius. You know? Can you can you explain the vacuum and how you do it?

**Speaker 1:** Well, as a as a beginner, you basically already have the vacuum by accident because you just don't know what the fuck to say. So you keep grasping for straws. You keep being like, oh, so what do I say now? And then those accidental vacuums or if you end up trying to do a vacuum because you already come from a nervous frame to the girl, it just seems like a sign of weakness. Whereas if you are confident, if you approach without much energy, if you're just not that invested, a sign of silent well, silence rather, would look as a sign of strength. It would look as if he's so confident that he doesn't need to fill every space with words. So all of a sudden, a lot of girls will react extremely positively to the fact that you don't say anything. So by virtue that you try to sell yourself, you actually end up losing the girl.

**Speaker 0:** Can you give away the gambit? I use this question on a date. You use this question on a date. I say to the girl at some point on the date, what do you like about me? But can you can you explain how you say it and what you do at that very point when you say it to her? Yeah. As in

**Speaker 1:** that that question sort of seems somewhat needy to like, if we were having a roundtable discussion on that question, people would argue like, no. It looks like a needy question. Yeah. But the thing is that question depends how it's asked. If I ask it in a way like, oh, so what do you like about me? Then in that circumstance, it's obviously coming from a position of weakness. You're clearly so insecure that you need the validation. Whereas if you just calm down, look at her in the eyes, and say something along the lines of, so what do you like about me? Then Cue the vacuum. Yeah. And you you lean in again. Again, leaning in. That's a big no no in game. But done at the right time. What do you like about me? I fucker. Vacuum. It's super powerful. You know? She will often start giggling and looking away and she will generally start thinking like a long time because she wants to give a good enough response that you will be satisfied with it.

**Speaker 0:** Okay. Another practical example, the front stop of glory. Most men around the world just think that daygame is jumping in front of girls at a 100 miles an hour on the street in front and doing the spiel. But I always say, that's certainly not the case. So you've adapted, changed. You don't do it. What's your opinion on the front stop for digging?

**Speaker 1:** Well, again, as in I'm a pretty big dude. So if I constantly run-in front of girls, a lot of the girls, if there's no other clear indication, they will get freaked out. I remember, like, when I first started, there was this one set where in Chinatown in London where I ran in front of a girl, and she started screaming because she thought I was mugging her. And she ran away. I couldn't say a single word. And everyone around me just sort of looked at me like, what the hell is going on here? So I I sort of started seeing that the front stop is not always necessary in every single situation.

**Speaker 0:** But for a beginner who's on Oxford Street or, 5th Avenue, you have to learn it because it's a great tool. Of course, it can get you laid and it teaches you dominance and aggression and mans you up and it gives you balls. But after a year of doing that, you know, time to try the side stop. Go in a shop. Try a girl seated in Starbucks. Try shock horror changing your opener from saying you look nice to you look beautiful, you look cute, you look stunning, you are ridiculously fantastic, whatever. Doesn't really matter. It's the underlying frame. So it's really learning the rules and then throwing it away, which is another cheesy Bruce Lee quote at some point, but it's true. Useless advice, completely useless advice for a beginner. If you're listening to this and you've never done daygame, watch my beginner daygame video and go and just execute it exactly. Look at my date model, execute it exactly. And then when you start picking up on these windows that you're talking about, yeah, that that gut feeling that or even just boredom of going on all these dates, you know, you must be hitting that boredom threshold now after so many dates you think, okay, fuck it. I'm gonna just try. Just gonna try and not tell that story. I'm gonna try something really weird here and kiss her within twenty minutes, you know, five minutes or take it home. You know what I mean? It's for you now, it's you you you have to unlearn, refine, go from verbal to nonverbal. That's it. You know what I mean?

**Speaker 1:** Yeah. Absolutely. As in, again, I have these stories that I've practiced and practiced even before daygame. I for example, I have this one great story of the this one time that three guys tried to mug me. I defended myself, ended up getting stabbed, but I ended up defending a guy against a guy with a gun. So it's a great story to tell. And if told right, you can really generate interest. But the thing is by this point, I've sort of told it so many times that it just gets boring. It just get I know what notes to hit. I know what to say, and it just feels very mechanical. And I have various stories like that that are generally good stories. But the thing is, it just doesn't feel natural anymore because I'm just looking for a reaction rather than telling them because they come naturally, rather than the situation presented itself to be like that, I always look for an opportunity to be like, ah, I have a I have a good story to tell you because I came from this entertainer mindset, which is the wrong mindset to approach. You are not there to entertain the girl. Yeah. You are there to fuck her. Yeah. So anything that doesn't convey that is

**Speaker 0:** not necessary. Yeah. It's a necessary evil to go through that dancing monkey stage. Yeah? But it's time to put it to sleep. And I often think the more talking I do now on a day, the less chance I have of fucking you know, I keep that in my mind. Less talking, more action, chill, vacuum, physically escalate, and most importantly, to her the magic statement, let's go. Feet start walking towards whatever the bus or the train, stop outside the apartment and at least say to her, you know, half a bottle of wine upstairs. Do you wanna come up? You know, let's have a quick drink. Having the courage to do that. Anyway, think time is upon us. Grandfather time, the clock has wound down once again. Boys and girls, that's been half an hour of your time, which I appreciate you giving up. I never say thank you for listening to these podcasts, but thank you. If you're a regular listener, you download this, you listen to this whilst making sweet love. That's amazing. Listening to my voice and Richard's voice as you do your beautiful lovemaking around the world. Thanks for that. You might be listening through YouTube. If you are, get on iTunes. It's far more convenient. You can listen to me underwater with some head underwater headphones whilst swimming your laps in the gym. Anyway, Richard, I'll see you maybe back in London or I might see you in, I don't know, Serbia, Hungary, Prague, here after your winter hibernation, which sounds like a good idea. But cheers for that, mate. Thank you very much for coming on. Many thanks for having me here. You're welcome. And I will speak to you next week.