---
title: Episode 42 Tracking Your Progress
episode_number: 42
era: early
source_file: Episode 42 Tracking Your Progress.mp3
audio_size_mb: 55.8
duration_sec: 1829.0
duration_min: 30.5
language: en
provider: deepgram
model: nova-3
diarized: true
confidence: 0.997
transcribed_at: 2026-05-28T06:30:48Z---

# Episode 42 Tracking Your Progress

**Speaker 0:** Happy New Year, you filthy animals. This is your uncle, Tom Torero, with podcast 42 coming in your ears. Thank you very much for tuning in. Hope Hope you had a wonderful Christmas, and we're here. 2016. It's upon us. I always get excited when you can see the year ahead stretched out. It's like when you're a kid, and it's the beginning of the summer holidays, and you can just see endless possibilities. I've just put out a video about how to seize the day, grab life by the horns. Don't just think about creating resolutions and promises, but less talking, more action, putting your money where your mouth is, showing, not telling, and doing. Tom Torero is all about taking action. And in the video, which has just gone up on my YouTube channel yesterday, I explained how to do it. The basis of it is habit forming. Yeah. It takes sixty six days around sixty six days to form a habit that becomes habitual, instinctive. You take it from thinking about doing it, your full brain, into just repetitive muscle memory that's in the hindbrain, whether you wanna do push ups every day or do something towards building a business every day or, drum roll, please, approaching girls every day. So at least two months going out every day, period of immersion to do day game. Now lots of guys gasp, come up with the weasel excuses, say, I just don't have time. That's impossible talking to girls every day. Ridiculous. Can't fit it in. Well, I'd argue that if you're listening to this podcast, it's about prioritizing what you want. And for most guys, even if you got the CEO position in the Ferrari, it's still about women, whether that's sleeping with women or dating one woman at a time. Whatever you're in this for, women are our carrot. Yeah? They are the motivation. I said game is the Trojan horse. And up there for me, a massive, massive, massive drive priority is women. So you've gotta make time for it just like you make time with work. You make time going to work, commuting to work. You've got your lunch break where you could talk to one or two girls. You've got definitely half an hour after work. Even when you're in the supermarket buying your dinner or you pop out to the shops at some point, you've got half an hour to do a few approaches. You've got some time on the weekend. I used to have that nine to five teaching doc job and I'd still go out after work knackered and I had that resolution which I turned into a habit of talking to girls every day until I got one number. So it was one number a day, and I kept that up for about two years. So it's no surprise that daygame becomes instinctive ingrained. And then it looks like you're doing something naturally, but what you don't see when you see a good tennis player or a good guitar player is the hours and hours and hours of repetition and, quote, unquote, failure to get to that point. So it's about setting goals. That's the 10% of it saying, okay. Whatever. One girl at lunch break or gonna speak to five girls every day. But more importantly, starting it, maintaining it for at least two months. So don't expect miracles immediately. Guys, you know, do a few sessions of daygame and say, it's not working. You've really gotta give it a fair neutral shot to record your results if you want, and give it a chance to work. Give yourself a chance to understand the basic principles and ingrain the London daygame model and to to switch from the nice guy to the player, etcetera, etcetera. That's what this podcast is about, tracking your progress. Because I'm a little bit fed up of this myth of outcome independence. Certainly, if you're a beginner, I understand what it means, the the the myth of outcome independence when they say, sure. You've gotta be in this to get better at game, but you've also gotta have a freedom from outcome. I call it being the Buddha as well. Yeah? You can't be, too on on on because it looks needy. And theoretically, that's correct. But when you're a beginner, you really do need to have a focus goal, focus targets. You need to schedule your daygame like when you're going to the gym or if you're eating clean, need to know what you're buying and what you're cooking. So for a beginner, I'd forget this Zen Buddha outcome independence. First, you gotta go, like I always say, through the badass, and then you can swing back the other way. And it's a true statistic that more than eighty percent of guys who start daygame, perhaps they've done a boot camp or a little bit of training, they drop out very quickly because they they try for a little bit. They get this harsh feedback from reality. They don't like it. They don't realize that girls are gonna say no. Girls are gonna flake. Girls are gonna give LMR. And they sink into the old bad habits again, so they never get the momentum. They never get that internalization. Maybe they come back to it again and it feels rusty and they try again and they drop out. Even worse, they keep switching between daygame and nightgame and online game and this coach and this coach and this coach hoping for like a magic pill when, like I've said in previous recordings, the basis of game game rules are are unchanging. They're always gonna be the same. So you need to learn them and internalize them and choose a system. So choose daygame, choose nightgame, choose mastering Tinder, whatever you choose. You've gotta stick with it. Yeah. You've really, really gotta give it your best shot, like I've just said, for at least sixty six days. But I'd say with daygame, well, we're gonna come on to stats and ratios about half a year. Give this system half a year of going out regularly. Okay? Now by game, let's just kick this off with a quick definition. Gaming girls, I'm not talking about horrible milfs or minger fatties from online or dodgy Tinder dates. I'm talking about good game. Okay? So the definition of a good lay in terms of pickup is that the girl is younger than you, and she's hotter than you, and she's she's quote, unquote, purer than you. Yeah. She's had less lays than you. Yeah. You can have some really fit milfs. So I'm not saying, you know, a milf is not a lay, but they're the exceptions. You you shouldn't be having them regularly. They can't be your staple diet. Okay? Really, you're going for what all men find attractive, younger, hotter girls. And therefore, you know that she's not just an easy yes girl. This is game. Alright? Now we're gonna give in this podcast some expected stats, some expected ratios. But, again, the disclaimer is all of this depends on your baseline sexual market value, what your starting game with. Some guys have very strong SMB, sexual market value. Some guys need to do a lot of work on other factors too. So you've got your current SMV and how much you're already working towards your potential SMV. Because remember, they're different. SMV is relative and fluid. It can change. So that's the disclaimer. Don't say, well, it's different for me or that didn't work for me or my friend had these kind of results. This is just a very rough approximation of what I've seen with myself, with other very good daygamers and hundreds and hundreds, probably now thousands of students that I've taught. Okay. How many sets do you need to do? Whether you're a beginner, intermediate, or whatever. Most active day gamers around the world that are good are doing between thirty and fifty approaches a week. When you're a beginner, try to do more like 50, and you can dial it down as you get better and better. But 30 approaches to 50 approaches a week, going out three nights a week after work and doing 10 approaches. So ten, ten, 10, that makes 30. And then a long session on Saturday or Sunday of 20, 13, 20, that's your 50. You can vary that, but that gives you an idea of the reps. Okay? So no point going out and doing three a week and saying it's not for me, it doesn't work. Because remember the yes, no, maybe. It's not a numbers game, but we're improving our odds. And there's always gonna be girls that are no. We're gonna find some lucky yeses, but game is played with the maybe girls, converting the maybe girls. Okay? Now I would class a guy who's done no to 200 approaches as a beginner. So under 200 approaches you don't really know what's going on, you shouldn't be micromanaging or recording yourself. It's very volatile. You're just jumping in. You're gonna have brain freeze. You're gonna have high AA. You're gonna run out of things to say. Eject in the middle of the set. You're gonna get flaky numbers, nice guy dates, whatever. And you could do 200 approaches in somewhere between just starting out and let's say four months. Okay. So that's the period begin as hell. You just gotta battle through that. So you desensitize yourself. You've got some momentum. And just the basics of cold approach are getting used to the the approach and the stack. Yeah? Now if you've done between 200 and let's say 500 approaches, somewhere between four and six months, you could say you're pre intermediate. Alright? You have a rough idea of the London daygame model. You might be recording a few sessions as an m p three or on a dictaphone. You know the model. You know where you're slipping up. You know your blind spots. You know your weasels, and you know your sticking points. And you're getting numbers, and they're quite flaky. We'll come on to that. If you've done between 500 and a thousand, so somewhere half a year, a year of daygame, that's kind of intermediate. And any more than a thousand, any more than doing daygame a lot for more than a year, you're you're intermediate, you're upper intermediate, and then the sky's the limit. Again, remember, you you're coming at this with a different baseline social market value SMV to another guy. So you've got to consider the elements of a male SMV. Go back to the talk I did with Nick Krauser on that, and check out all the different aspects of male SMV and write them as a list. That's a good January activity. Where are your strengths? Where are your weaknesses? Because cold approach is is a funnel. It funnels your SMV. It's part of your SMV as well because it's very attractive to go up and be confident and charismatic. But it's like a laser beam approach to delivering your SMV. I call it an SMV delivery mechanism. That's what the hustle is. So the stronger your starting point, obviously, the better. Now what results can be expected from those kind of timetables for beginner, pre intermediate, intermediate, and upper intermediate? Well, a beginner, most of his numbers that he collects are gonna flake. Now by flake, we mean she either doesn't text back to your first text or she texts for a little bit and it's a bit weak, and then she just vanishes. Okay? And you certainly don't have a date with her or sleep with him. So a beginner might get one or maybe two dates a month, and he needs to talk to a 150, maybe more gills, depending on the baseline SMV, to get his first daygame lay. Okay. Now I always say to beginners, you know, beggars can't be choosers. You're not going for that dream Victoria's Secret 10 or your whatever your idea of a nine or 10 is. You know, don't be fussy. If you're currently getting laid with not very attractive girls or not very attractive milfs off Tinder and online, don't be fussy if you daygame a six. Push yourself to daygame lots and lots of sevens, and then, you know, the eights start coming along and the odd nines. So, you know, be realistic. Again, PUA marketing, often the American style marketing. I spoke about that in my last podcast. It's spammy, and it's just advertising. Okay? Right. You get past that into pre intermediate. And let's say three quarters of the numbers you get flake. Because remember, you're you're probably running nice guy game where you're forcing the number. You're not revealing your intention, doesn't really know what you want, interactions are too quick, you're sending mixed signals, you might get a couple of dates a month and maybe, I don't know, one lay every 100 plus sets. Okay. Again, very rough ideas. Intermediate, maybe two thirds of your numbers flake. Two out of three. You might be going on three dates a month, maybe four, and you're bringing your lay down to having to do between 70 and a 100 sets. And you know, this is why it's important because, can I say, well, forget about stats, forget about ratios, it's competitive, it's notch counting? It's rubbish. No. It's not. This is a skill set that you need to track as a beginner. Yeah? Repetition, internalization, muscle memory, desensitization, momentum. If you did any other sport, let's say you were doing tennis and you were learning the tennis skill set, of course, you would track your results. So beginning game and pickup, it's no different. So eye on the prize. Let's know what's going on. So that was intermediate. Now upper intermediate and anything beyond that, be quite happy if half your numbers flake. And I can hear guys going, what? You don't get a 100% of the girls out who give you their number? No. That's just the way of the world. You know, she might be in a bad mood. She might have a boyfriend. She might be about to get married. Her dog died. She stressed. She didn't like you. She was just trying to get rid of you. She's weird. Whatever. That's just the laws of the universe if you believe in that stuff. Half your numbers, are solid and they come out. Half your numbers, you don't get them out. That's pretty good. Okay. I don't know any guy that's getting, you know, 100% hit rate. It's great if you're getting one date a week or more than one date, you know, two or three. That's fantastic. And you're getting laid from between, I don't know, thirty, forty, fifty, sixty, maybe 70 sets. If you can get one younger, hotter girl, she's not a yes girl, but, know, you converted her using the Torero toolkit, the street hustle toolkit. You got her using proper game skills, and that's great. Because if you're only, quote, unquote, sleeping with one new younger, hotter girl a month, that's 12 a year. And bear in mind that the average guy they they they throw this statistic around online. The average guy in the world sleeps with seven women in his lifetime. So if you're sleeping with 12 very attractive, pleasant girls every year and you're, you know, staying a free bachelor until you're at least 35 and you've just got into game and maybe you're 21, 22, that's a lot of women. Okay? My personal target and other coaches I know, guys that have been in daygame for a long time, really, I should be getting two lays a month minimum, okay, if I'm actively daygaming, if I'm not in proper hibernation or loved up for some reason. So two lays a month with quality girls. So around 24 girls a year, I'm happy with that. Every year, I'm, you know, pushing for the quality, trying to improve my odds, so approach less, but get better results, etcetera, etcetera. So anything more than that, you know, imagine one lay a week, and you did that for five years. Just you can do the maths. So, again, no guys getting every single girl. Don't believe that. Pick up marketing spammy stuff. Okay. Caveat, disclaimer again, because I've met this year or 2015, met four, five guys maybe who had become so obsessed with cold approach that they had become what I call serial openers. Okay? We know them as spammy spammy daygamers, where they're not thinking. They just hear a podcast like this, so they read stats like this online and they think, okay. Tom Torero said, all I need to do is x number of approaches to get x lays. Here we go. And with very little skill and very little improvement on their SMV, you know, they just throw out all the game advice and they just open, open, open, open, open, open. I know one guy that had opened more than a thousand women, and he had had one or two dates and no lays because he wasn't learning intelligently. He was just opening. No. Opening. No. Opening. No. That's fine, the yes girl. I've said many times, if you did that throughout London or New York City, yeah, eventually, you'll find some kind of girl who was just a gift from the gods, yes girl, but that that's not game. And that's exhausting, and you can't keep that up. And it's burning whole streets for other daygamers, if you like, in some, you know, really cool areas. So intelligent learning, learning from the feedback you get from the girl. Remember, the girl is your mirror. Learning from the advice a wing gives you. Recording yourself. Remember, not for the first hundred, two hundred sets, but after that record yourself with a dictaphone or an m p three. Compare it to the recordings you hear from guys like me or guys who've been doing it a long time and think what's different. What am I doing that you're not doing? Are you stuck in comfort? Are you running out of things to say? Is it dull conversation? Are you sounding too robotic? Is your vibe off? Are you trying too hard? Are you being like an old school entertainer, pickup artist, and it just it's not calibrated to the environment, to the daytime, whatever. Are you speaking too quickly? Is your voice going up? Are you closing too quickly? Are you doing too much talking? Are you too agreeable? Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. There's millions of things that can be going wrong. I've covered lots of them on my street hustle training videos so you can compare what is going on, and then you can track your progress. So some guys are doing this blindly. They're just going out hoping for the best. For my first year, second year, and third year, I kept Oxford University style stats. I had spreadsheets with how many sets I did, how many of them were harsh blowouts, how many of them hooked, how many numbers I got, how many Facebooks I got, who texted back, how many came on dates, how many did I kiss, how far did I get with the rest, and then how many lays. Now that's very geeky. That's very obsessive. You don't want that to become your vibe. Remember, it's not pick up science. It's pick up arts. But certainly for the first year, you need to know what's going on. After that, you can take away the stabilizers and the scaffolding. You can start freestyling, putting, that bubbly fizzy energy into it, having a lot of fun with it. It's like learning to drive. You know? Knuckle down. Do your theory test. Learn where the gears are, learn where the indicators are, learn to use the mirrors, learn on small roads, pick up your speed, eventually learn motorway driving, do an advanced driving course, and then, yeah, you can drive with the window down, you can be changing the music. You can be cheekily checking a text or whatever. You can be doing multiple things in a car if you've been driving for three or four years. It's just instinctive. It's automated, and that's why it looks, quote, unquote, natural. I call it being supernatural. Okay? Because in the beginning, it's probably 80% thinking about what you're doing, like I'm talking about in this podcast, and 20% coming up with things on the fly. But then after a few years, it should be 80% just relying on your vibe like I do now. Just looking after my vibe, sleeping well, eating well, being positive, not knackering myself out, not having day game burnout. And 20% of the time on the streets or over text or on dates or in my bedroom. Yeah. I am thinking about structures. You know? Oh, yeah. I'm doing too much pull. I need to vacuum. Okay. Try this kino trick or remember this cocky funny line. But most of the time, if you listen to my recordings of me on dates or pulling girls back or on the street, I'm just responding. I'm, quote, unquote, in the moment. But I really say to beginners, don't get into all this hippie stuff. Don't rely on your vibe. Don't rely on coming up with amazing things to say. That would be madness in a car, wouldn't it? Or that would be madness trying to learn to play tennis and just jumping into Wimbledon and trying to wing it. So know what's going on. I can't repeat that enough. Know where you are. A guy should be able to tap you, I say, at any point in the pickup from open to close, and say to you, oi, where are you? What's going on? Are you in attraction? Has she hooked? Is she investing? Are you spiking enough? Are you leading enough? Are you escalating enough? What's going on? Are we ready for the bounce? Is she compliant? Is she not compliant? Do need to go back to comfort? You should know this stuff. Alright? It's all out there for free on YouTube. And we wanna be always up in the antics. So a beginner's gonna be doing, you know, slow moving tourists, single sets, obviously, which is very productive for daygame. But then don't forget, you wanna be doing the the runaround wheel of fortune stop on faster moving girls, prettier girls, girls with headphones, girls who are texting, waiting girls, girls in a shop shop assistance, girls who are sitting in cafes, then build it up to two sets to practice your spiking and to practice your your banter skills, yeah, and spinning two plates. Go through a period of practicing eye dates, so you get comfortable with that. Go through a period of just saying, okay. I'm gonna do Tom Torero's burn your boats mission. You might have heard me talk about this, which is just leaving your phone at home. Because remember, can't fuck a phone number. So you go out. This is good for gutter game, but you can do it in the afternoon. You go out without a phone, without a wing. It's like being dropped into enemy territory. And you're saying, right. Let's go as far as we can, you know, burning your boats like previous soldiers did, where the only option was to keep going. So you've got to push for the instant date. You've got to escalate. You've got to push to go to yours or to hers or to overcome difficult logistics because it's all about delay. So that's pushing things. And when I was in year number one and year number two of daygame, if you read my first book, daygame, you'll see that I went out with my wing, a great wing, who pushed me really hard on certain missions. Would say, okay. We're today, we're gonna do Posh Gills, Kings Road. Today, we're gonna do bohemian gills in Camden. Today, we're gonna go for kiss closes. Today, we're gonna see how far we can take a girl together. Today, we're gonna do two set bounces. Today, we're gonna do gutter game. And then we moved into club promotion, and we moved into all sorts of stuff. But that's how we did it. He was doing a PhD at the time. Now he's a hedge fund manager, and I was this geeky Oxford grad. And that was efficiency. Obviously, now, I'm not going out on missions and really doing that unless I'm with a student, but it really, really, really was effective. Okay. Some other things to remember. Right? You can't same day lay every girl. That's another pickup myth. You know, you feel guilty if you're not trying for same delay and it doesn't work. Not all girls. I think I took yeah. I took about this in daygame and also in Torero travels. There's a certain type of girl. There's indicators to spot this type of girl. It's very good for practicing, but you shouldn't always be after, you know, trying to same day lay her. It's the same with trying to have sex on the first date. Now I call that plan a. It's obviously the best option because you wanna sleep with the girl as quickly as possible, then you've got that clarity of vision, you can decide whether she's cool and you want to see her again, make her your girlfriend. But it really locks things down. So yeah, if you manage to get her back to your house on the first date or you go back to hers, that's great. That's the best strategy. But the truth is, from my data and other guys' data, maybe a quarter of girls, maybe less are up for sex on the first date. You know, same day lay much smaller, but let's say a quarter or a fifth of girls are up for first date sex. Yep. It depends on the country you're in. So, obviously, Dubai is gonna be different to Las Vegas, but that's an approximation, yeah, even in London and New York. Now about half the girls will sleep with you on the second date. Second date seems to be very normal. Middle Europe, in Europe, even in London and America, girls like, you know, not to feel super slutty. Doesn't mean she wants to be your girlfriend, but she just doesn't want that slutty feeling afterwards. Yeah? Because society's judging her and her friends are judging her and she's had bad one night stand experiences in the past. So let's say half and maybe a quarter, it takes a third date. Obviously, in some former Soviet Union countries, yep, three dates is the norm. I don't personally go beyond three dates now, but when I started out in that book daygame, you know, I'm going on four dates, five dates, six dates, getting obviously put in the boyfriend box, the nice guy make him wait box. But that gives you an idea of approximation. So again, you shouldn't be thinking why aren't all girls same day laying? Or why aren't all girls sleeping with me on the first date? This is not what I am I'm reading about or hearing on YouTube. Yeah. It's obviously great when you get fast sex and, you know, that that sells for advertising. That's why YouTube channels have stuff like that, and I put out audios like that. But in reality, over time, looking at data and normal distributions and means, this is what we really wanna see. Okay? So I'll wrap it up there for approximations and tracking your progress. I've given you enough data. Please don't argue underneath this video or write to me saying, well, I think it's 63.4 or, know, telling you telling me anomalies, you know, oh, I had a run of seven using blah blah blah blah blah. We're looking at general data for guys from Los Angeles, Miami, New York, Sydney, Moscow, London, Berlin, Paris, wherever. Yeah. We've got to step back, zoom out. And remember, the disclaimer is about your baseline SMB. So a good January thing, like I said, would be to go back, listen to my things on sexual economics or read my new book Street Hustle, which has got a lot of this stuff in it, and just zoom out for yourself and say, what am I working on this year? What are my targets? What habits am I forming? What targets do I want per week, per month, etcetera, etcetera. And then after that's your 10% thinking and planning, it's gonna be 90% execution. So going out there and doing it. If you're still struggling with AA, get a wing or be brutal on yourself. You know? It's like going to the gym. Have a schedule. Stick to it. If you're living in a very small town or city, I'm sorry, but like I've said before, prioritize this and take time out, sabbatical, go on a long weekend. Just go somewhere where you have high volume. Because, you know, night gamers are lucky. They've got high volume clubs everywhere. Day gamers, we need foot traffic. We need anonymity. We need New York City. We need Santa Monica. We need Sydney. We need a glorious, glorious London. Alright? You need to be able to practice on a lot of girls, especially if you're a beginner. And don't be fussy. It's you know, you're not going out there as a needy guy immediately trying to date a girl or find your wife. We say when we train guys, you're practicing the skill set. You're not practicing to to get an immediate girlfriend. Yes. It's all about the skill set. So nothing wrong with baby steps and starting small. There you go. Some little announcements at the end of this podcast, podcast 42. This year, I am going to be going well, very soon, in a couple of days, in a few days time, I'm going to Iceland. I'm going to Reykjavik to do some daygame and see some sites. Then I'm off to Colombia in South America. And for a little bit, something secret in El Salvador, going by Miami for the Colombia trip. So I'll be in Miami just for a little bit. Then I've got some clients. I've got some exciting destinations for teaching already. I'm going to Singapore. That's booked in to teach. And I'm going to Estonia. That's booked in to teach. And then this year, in the spring, I'll definitely be in New York City working on a project giving some talks and obviously doing some teaching. I'm gonna make it up to Canada because Canadians keep emailing me emailing me. I will be coming to Toronto. Not sure about Vancouver, but Toronto, 100%, for sure, during the same period as New York. And then I'm gonna be going back to the cities that I love in Europe. I've got some new ones. I might go to Sarajevo. I might revisit Sofia. I've been there in Bulgaria, but I wanna wanna do a little bit more. I've got some new Russian cities on the cards. I've got some secret destinations. The good thing now after having traveled for many, many years to do this ridiculous thing that I do, both a job and a passion, I know where my little secret hotspots are. I know you don't have to tell people. Often, I don't even tell wings because I know that I just love these places. They work for me. The girls are smoking hot, and I go there year in, year out. And for you, you'll have different cities that you love, different places that you love, different cultures, different vibes, different temperatures. And, obviously, your definition of a nine or a 10 is different to my preferred definition of a nine or a 10. So, again, don't worry about pussy paradise. Stop dreaming of that, but go out and test it. If you wanna kick up the ass, I've got one space left on my Saturday street hustle training on Saturday, January 16. That's not long, between Iceland and Colombia. It's five hours, 12:00 till 5PM. It's two students. It's all in field, on the street, in cafes, in stores, in malls, in stations. It's the London daygame model and a lot of the Torero toolkit. We have time at the end to talk about texting and date models, but it's really to encourage you and to show you how to take those first steps and to take action. There you go. Enough to get you started for 2016. I hope it's happy. I hope it's healthy. I hope it's horny. Speak to you next time.