---
title: Episode 77 Respect The Hustle
episode_number: 77
era: mid
source_file: Episode 77 Respect The Hustle.mp3
audio_size_mb: 56.1
duration_sec: 1839.8
duration_min: 30.7
language: en
provider: deepgram
model: nova-3
diarized: true
confidence: 0.999
transcribed_at: 2026-05-28T07:15:50Z---

# Episode 77 Respect The Hustle

**Speaker 0:** Podcast 77, respect the hustle with Tom Torero. It's October. The year is flying by. I hope your daygame street hustling is going well. Maybe you're in the Northern Hemisphere and you've had a busy year. Maybe you're in the Southern Hemisphere and it's only just beginning with your spring and summer. Maybe you're off to South America or you're off to Australia or you're off to South Africa to continue your hustle. Wherever, whatever, I hope it's going well. And that's the message of this podcast really, which we shall come on to after the Torero news for today. First of all, the meetup in Toronto. I'm off to Canada in a few days time, flying to Toronto, and it's not gonna be an evening meetup. It's a Sunday brunch meetup. So pretty much a week from now, Sunday October 9, I'll be standing outside Topman on Queen Street West, right in the middle of downtown at 11AM. I'll post that on Twitter. I'll post that on my Facebook, put it on Instagram so you can't miss it. Sunday, October 9, Topman, Queen Street West, 11AM. Maybe we'll go to a park opposite. If the weather's good, maybe we'll go for coffee. Maybe we'll go for some food. Depends how many people show up. We'll do a q and a, and we shall have some banter. We shall have a natter as we as we say in Great Britain. So that's the first one. Come along if you're in Toronto. Find a day game wing and have some banter. Second thing, I've just put up an article yesterday on my www.tomterrero.com site, which is about the top day game cities in the world. Loads of guys ask me about where the best place is to daygame. Often they're asking where is the easiest or where are the hottest girls? And there are different subtopics which I've spoken about before. But this article is about big pedestrian cities that we know and love across the world for daygame. So that's not on YouTube. That's nowhere else. You have to go to my site for that. That's why I keep nagging people. Don't just rely on YouTube or don't even rely on iTunes for my content. It all kind of funnels into my site. So go there to find everything else. And on there, you can add me on Twitter. You can see my Instagram, which is, again, got stuff which is not on YouTube, the kind of behind the scenes stuff. Alright. This podcast, respect the hustle. It's divided into two parts, you could say. The first part is about the game hustle, the wider meaning of hustling, not just with daygame, but how to pick up girls in other forms and why we should respect that. And the second thing is about hustling in life. Grinding, not on Grindr, not on Tinder, hustling, working hard in other areas, whether that's setting up your own brand, running a day game business, going for an examination, going for a qualification, building something up. Yeah. And hustling with girls. I'll talk about the hustle philosophy and how I view the grind, how I view my hustle. Okay. The first part is daygame and the why the meaning of hustling because many daygamers, and I've been guilty of this in the past, are very binary, very black and white. You could say very obsessive. They are purists and they say, well, only daygame matters. Okay? Forget night game. Forget entourage game. Forget ecosystem game. Forget guys that do the kind of gym game or celebrity game. All that's cheating. And the only thing that matters and is real is daygame. And the only thing I must do is jump in front of single girls and say the same thing, and that's what works, and that's pure. Okay. Well, I can understand when you're getting into daygame, it's good to be fanatical. And I certainly was fanatical for two, three, four years, obsessively working on this skill set. And it's a skill set. It's a form of game that gets you laid with hot girls, young hot girls, and it does what it says on the tin. So it's fantastic. But if you've read my first book daygame, guys are often surprised that I did some game in beer gardens. I did game in lounge bars. I did game in smoking areas. I did game with a wing. I did two sets. I did entourage game. I did some club game. I did stripper game. I did indirect game. I still do indirect direct opening. I open in shops and cafes and parks, not just jumping in front of girls on the street. That's what I mean by making it three d, not just two d. You don't want to be this robot. You don't wanna see the London daygame model as a religion set in stone as a computer program. No. No. No. No. No. Okay? Don't be rigid. Don't be blinkered. Don't be binary. Old school game or game is really just social dynamics. It's somebody with a high social intelligence like Casanova. Yep. It's an art form. It's called the pickup arts, not the pickup sciences or it's not the Alright? And social intelligence is this wonderful wide thing. That's why I say night gamers have an advantage over day gamers in that they are learning group dynamics. They are learning about IOIs and IODs in a much wider situation. They are learning the art of holding court in a social gathering, specifically the old kind of form of game where you really learn social dynamics bit by bit. This was fantastic. So you're not just a one trick pony. Alright? I love direct game. I love direct daygame, but some guys see it as that's the only thing in existence. You go to a girl, you tell her you like her, is she a yes girl, same day lay, bang. And they say, well, that's alpha, bro. Or the smash and grab guys, I call them in the night where they say there is no game. Just grab the drunk girl, fuck her in a toilet, Wham bam. Thank you, ma'am. Or even worse than natural game guys that say there is no game at all. Align your chakras, be yourself, filter, find a girl who likes you. That's not nuanced game in, the sense that it's an art, that you understand social dynamics. You have a high social intelligence. You're calibrated. Listen to my podcast on calibration. This is beautiful game. And that's why I'm saying respect the hustle. So if you are a daygamer listening to this, perhaps you are guilty of being a purist, Respect nightgamers. Yeah. Respect guys that work massive groups. Respect guys that do entourage game. It's like I've said on a tweet, think I've said in street hustle, daygame is like a close-up magician doing a card trick or a coin trick to a small group of people at a table. A card magician with fantastic skill, very dexterous hands. Whereas nightgame, you could say your entourage game is like the big stage magicians, the David Copperfield's outrageous, outlandish props, costumes, and music. It's an art form. Alright? It's different to daygame. I've said before, I've never really met a guy who's amazing at daygame and a guy who's amazing at nightgame because they are different parts of the brain, different personalities, different skill set. Sure. The underlying mechanisms are the same, but you're practicing something obsessively. So respect those guys that have put in the ten thousand hours or whatever for nightgame or guys that run promotion things and workout pool party game, workout table game in Vegas and Miami. Respect guys, and I've got friends that do this that have dedicated their whole lives to ecosystem game. So they've become diving instructors. They've become hostel managers. They've become tour guides. They've become ski instructors. They've become DJs. They're in a rock band. They've put in the hundreds or thousands of hours. Okay? And their system works. Undeniably, their system works. Same with the guy who's fanatical about do looks matter and he's dedicated his whole life to the Jersey Shore kind of made in Chelsea, made in Essex gym game, the looks game. Alright? There are lads and cart difference onesie in South Wales that play this game massively with the tan and the gym and the steroids and the fashion and the white teeth. They get laid. They've dedicated a lot of time and resources to this. It's a form of game whether you like it or not. It's like with fishing. There's different types of fishing. And I've said daygame is one form of fishing, but there's also deep sea fishing. There is angling in terms of I don't know. What's it called? Where you fly fishing. That's what I'm thinking of. Fly fishing, standing in a river with your wellies. There is tickling fish. You can see my ignorance with fishing here. There's whatever, line fishing, net fishing, all these different types of things, many different ways to skin a cat, the saying goes. So if you're a daygamer, respect it. Respect the hustle and particularly respect guys that have come before you. Maybe you're standing on the shoulders of giants. I I certainly am. That's why I give credit to people of the past who worked out social dynamics and put it on paper in terms of evolutionary biology. And if you're a daygamer, what can you do about it to stop being a a spammer if you're just doing exactly the same thing every time? Or you've gotten a bit comfortable with one set single girl during the day. What can you do? Well, I say, first of all, widen your social intelligence by getting off the street. Daygame is not just jumping in front of moving girls. Do standing girls. Do seated girls. Do two sets. Do two sets with the wing. Do shops. Do situations with high social pressure to push you push you out of that comfort zone. So you there's many infields of me doing cafes and weird situations on the metro or that one in Victoria's Secret. Like I said from my first book, do lounge game, lounge bar game. It's still daygame. Yeah. I did it in Miami in those wonderful gardens outside the club, in smoking areas, outside pizza places, gutter game. Yep. Sure. There might be guys in the set learn to win over a set. Push that kind of thing. Do some public speaking. Do a stand up comedy course. Not to be funny, but just do, again, work a room. I learned a lot of my social dynamics from being a classroom teacher in the fire baptism of fire. So the stuff they taught us at uni, it was pointless. But once you're in there interacting with children, a bit like a comedian working a room, you you get used to it. And flirt with everybody. Don't be a day game purist. Many of my students say, she's not hot enough. I'm waiting for my 10. And I purposefully show them how I banter with old guys, maybe the guy cleaning the streets or the guy serving us coffee or two old ladies in the perfume section of a department store. And the students often say to me, what's the point? That's not daygame. Daygame is jumping in front of a hot girl now. And I I say no, no, and no. This is all social dynamics. Flirtation is showing your nuanced social intelligence, which will get you a job, which will get you a promotion, which will engage people. You'll be magnetic. You'll be charismatic. Listen to my podcast on charisma and charm. Yeah? You'll have power, but you'll also have this warmth that people are drawn to, and they don't know why that's persuasion. That, my friends, is game. And that is a hustle. That is a learned muscle. Read the biography of Casanova by Ian Kelly. Not the bi autobiography of 12 volumes, but the biography by Ian Kelly. And it shows you why Casanova is so much more than just the stereotyped lover. He was the master of social intelligence and weaving his way into high society through banter, through charm, through networking, and through hustling. Amazing. Seducing aristocracy. So that is respecting the hustle. I'm respecting people that put in the hours. It was Gladwell, wasn't it, who famously said ten thousand hours to mastery. Well, that works out. I've broken this down here. That's about four hundred and seventeen days straight, twenty four hours of doing something. So if you devote three hours a day, that's about three thousand three hundred and thirty three days, which is just over nine years. I'd say that's perhaps too much. Alright? I did daygame obsessively for two years. You could say two, three hours a day after work. I got a real grasp of daygame after two, three years. Maybe I have put in ten thousand hours, but I don't think you need nine years for daygame. But they do say that a year in field is worth what, ten, fifteen years of just hanging out with your friends or being in your office. That's how you learn social intelligence on acid, on speed. Yeah? So that leads us nicely onto the second part of the podcast. Can you learn this from a blog, from a podcast, from a book, street hustle, from a Twitter account, from, writing that you do, from videos that you watch? Can you learn social dynamics and game in that way? No. Shock horror, listening to this podcast, or even reading Street Hustle will not get you good at game. I say it's 90% infield, 10% theory. So, sure, if you're infield and you're implementing all this stuff, you need that 10% to top up, to refine, to tweak, to get you on the right path. That's the scaffolding. That's the stabilizers. That's the London daygame model, but that's not game. So I famously said talking about game, writing about game, watching game, reading about game, that's not game. Right? Replace game with tennis or boxing. So talking about tennis, writing about tennis, watching tennis, reading tennis, knowing every single tennis statistic in the world won't make you a good tennis player. You have to face the balls coming at you again and again and again. Yeah. You might say it's ten thousand hours. You might say there's a predisposition to being fantastic, being one of the best tennis players in the world. But certainly, you can, get good better than 99% of people by putting in those hours, putting in that work, having a coach for the 10%, but then the 90% is doing it. So my hustle philosophy part two is what my tagline says. Grab life by the horns. Don't just watch about watch it. Don't read about it, but do it. Face the horns coming at you. Face the bull coming at you. That's how you get good at bullfighting. Make your hustle louder than your mouth. That's the famous quote that I love, and that's why I started calling it hustling and then street hustling. Because it's not just hustling in terms of a cheeky magic trick, a bit of deception, which is win win. But it's hustle in terms of the grind. It's hustle in terms of doing, taking action, walking the walk. And this is what I'm famous for. This is what I preach. This is what I teach. This is what I live. So you've got to live it. You can't just talk about it. So I live this life now in that I quit my job. I travel. I do day game. I seduce. I teach other guys to do it. And then I document it. Yep. So show, don't tell. There's far too many blogs and articles and Twitter accounts where guys are telling about their adventures and telling about what they're doing. Much easier to show it. So I've stopped nagging students. Well, in the beginning when I was teaching students, I'd go through every little thing that I wanted them to change. And then I realized it's far easier to show, tell them one or two things, but then show them through a demonstration or my general vibe or, like I said, talking to some old people, some old women, showing them what I meant, whether that's voice, posture, teasing, challenging, banter. Execution. Right? Life is all about execution. You can have the greatest plans, but until you start shipping it, until you start executing, man, nothing's gonna change. Right? Think about it in terms of sales and marketing. You could have a mediocre product, but somebody who's shipping it hard and who's marketing it and pushing it, that's gonna do really well. Or you could have an amazing product with no marketing. Like I've said before, the Lamborghini in the garage. Nobody knows it's there. Nobody gives a shit. You can't win races until you drive it out of the garage. I'm passionate about this. Execute. Execute. Execute. It used to drive me mad at work when we had to sit in meetings and do planning, make written plans, do evaluation sheets, blue sky thinking, brainstorming, meetings, especially those daily morning meetings, which is a chance for people to moan, to procrastinate, to complain. And all these are the antithesis of action. Alright? They're poison. In terms of mental health, and this is something I've gone through, I've suffered from clinical stress, clinical anxiety, clinical depression. In terms of see seeing medical professionals for this and getting treatment, thinking is the enemy. Alright? It's overthinking. It's procrastinating that leads to depression and anxiety. So if I could tattoo something onto my arm, maybe I will. It would just be think less, do more. Think less, do more, or just do. I might get d o written in massive letters. Because my anxiety, my stress, my depression comes from times when I'm not doing anything. I'm lazy. I'm sitting there. Maybe I've reached target and I'm thinking, what now? What's the point? Then you start getting all these existential questions and worries in your head. What is the meaning of life? Where am I going? What did it mean? Oh, no. That thing happened to me many years ago and now I'm trapped. What am I gonna do? What's gonna happen in the future? And then you you just have overload of worry about the past, about the future. Well, as cheesy as it sounds, we need to be in the moment. The only reality is now. Think less. Do more. So whenever I get into that state, I stand up and I do something physical. I used to do this with kids. If kids sit down for too long, that's when the bad behavior starts. So every five, ten, fifteen minutes, just get them to stand up, turn around, put their arms in the air, sit down. So if you're worrying, you're stressed, number one, stand up. Do some breathing. Get physical. I go for a walk. As soon as I go for a walk, things start clicking into place. I feel better. As soon as I go for a day game stroll, it's like a meditation. Alright? That is my meditation. That is my quote, unquote mindfulness. Alright? It's the bungee jump into the now. As soon as I jump in front of a girl, it's a slap in the face with a wet fish, as we say in Britain. It's an ice ice bath. I've said many times cold approach is where the rubber meets the road. Right? Because pickup is a contact sport where you're getting this immediate feedback from reality. It's like rock climbing. And it's brutal. Often, it's brutal feedback from reality. This is why men give up. They don't like it. The bigger your ego, the older you are, the harder it is to take this feedback from reality with quote, unquote rejections and flakes. But that's what toughens you up. Yeah. You suck it up. Enough of the excuses. I've made videos. I've made part one and part two on my YouTube channel about day game excuses. Both excuses when you're on the street and excuses before you go out and do it. Not good enough. Right? We need to execute. We need to implement. We need to start. And the hardest part, as the cliched saying goes, is to start. So get off your ass and you often find, oh, it wasn't as bad as I was thinking. It was the worrying about starting, it was the procrastinating that is way worse than actually starting it. When you do your first approach, I say first one's the worst one. I famously said that. As soon as I've done that first approach, I'm like, oh, I don't feel apathetic anymore. I don't feel weird anymore. As soon as I've done five approaches, I am on. As soon as I've done 10, I am in flow. I am in the zone. My vibe is amazing. That's why I say to students and I say to you, don't go home after don't go home before doing 10. Yep. Because if you go home and if you do two and then go home, you've never hit that zen state. So I'm nagging you to, don't be a keyboard daygamer. Don't be a stay at home pickup artist. Don't be a paper tiger, they call it, hiding behind a blog or hiding behind Twitter or even going to lots of seminars or downloading lots of stuff, reading about stuff. That's not going to get you good at tennis. That's not going to get you good at boxing. That's not going to get you good at cooking, and that's definitely not going to get you good at pickup. Pickup is a skill set that you learn in the field. How many times do I have to say it? Yeah. So rubber meets the road. Get out there and do it. And we apply that concept across the board. So I certainly do with my life, whether I'm writing a book or I'm filming something or I'm booking tickets or I'm traveling, I just do it. Now that's good and bad. It's good because I get things done. Alright. I learned from my dad, bless him. His, you could say, bad habit was to start projects but not finish them. And when we cleared out my dad's study a few years ago, we found a 113 fantastic projects that were unfinished. Now, that's not knocking my dad because he did write books and he was very successful, but he could have been even more successful with a lot of that great work if he had been the closer on it. So I'm very wary of that in terms of finishing writing a book, finishing shooting a video, editing it, and uploading it, going to the place I said I was gonna go, doing what I said I was going to do. Yeah? So be the closer, not just the opener. That both applies to daygame and obviously your life. Being very careful of studying self help material because as I've said before, that's often mental masturbation. Yeah. I'm now in the habit of disregarding words. What I mean by that is disregarding what others write about me on paper or they write to me and they say they're going do so. Maybe that's a YouTube comment. It's a it's a nasty comment or it's a nasty tweet or it's a it's a bit of a negative email or somebody writes me a long plan of what they're going to do. Words. Words. Words. Alright? Until I see action, until I see somebody doing something, it doesn't really mean much. And I've learned that about my own words and other people's words. Yep. So I love it when I see a guy on the street doing daygame or a guy comes up to me and he's just done a bit of daygame and he recognizes me and he comes up and he's infield. That's fantastic. Or sure, he's at the seminar, but at the end of the seminar, he comes up and he tells me some success stories or failure stories about what he's actually done in field. It's the same with business and loads of guys saying they're gonna start a YouTube channel or a blog or they're gonna start this, they're gonna start that. And in the back of my mind, I'm thinking, yeah. Okay. Good luck. But let's see proof of the pudding. Yeah? Shakespeare said action is eloquence. So action means everything. I used to say the meetings, the discussion, the gossip, the news, the politics that people get into, all that gossip, that's inherently feminine. Right? The masculine is the opposite. It's doing. It's the mission. It's the hunter gatherer. It's the action. It's the kill. It's the close. Not debating, not discussions, not gossiping, not getting dragged down into all this petty feminine gossip, but it's pure action. Right? Action man, that's doing. And, I love this quote. I think it's by a guy called McCain. And he says, the common conception is that motivation leads to action. But actually, the reverse is true. Action precedes motivation. I used to have that quote stuck up on my wall because many people go to seminars and they read self help books and they get pumped up and they think, woo hoo. Let's take action. Whereas the reverse is true. You try something, you realize it works, you get positive reference points, positive energy. You remember it. You think, yeah. I went out and got that number from that hot girl. That inspires you to take more action. So people are putting the cart before the horse. Yeah? And the PUA health warning, I've said the bitter taste of the red pill is knowing all this stuff about game or, quote, unquote, the red pill and not swallowing it with action will lead to frustration, anger, bitterness, resentment, depression. And guys get addicted to this victim mentality. They get addicted to whining online, bitching online, complaining. It's toxic. And yeah, it's addictive. You're playing the victim. It's a downward spiral. It's what am I trying to say? You can have that upwards positive, self fulfilling prophecy or this downward spiral, which is also the self fulfilling prophecy. So let's wrap up this podcast because the time is flying by. There's so much I could say on action, but I wanted to finish with quotes that I've put on Twitter. I know. That's ironic. I'm putting quotes about taking action on Twitter, and people are reading this and getting motivated. But I really do like these quotes. I'm not a big one for cheesy quotes with pictures of sunsets and dolphins on Facebook. But any quote about action which kicks me up the ass to taking action has gotta be worth it. Yeah. So here are some quotes that I've put on Twitter. Action will remove the doubts that theory cannot solve. Here's another one. Action expresses priorities. Here's another one. Action always beats intention. Here's one from Goth Goth. Knowing is not enough. We must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do. Here's one from Robert Greene. Win through your actions, never through argument. Here's one from Emerson. An ounce of action is worth a ton of theory. And here's one from j f Kennedy. There are risks and costs to action, but they are far less than the long range risks of comfortable inaction. So action, work is the variable of success in your control. Think about that. Take an action bit. That's the bit that you can change to work towards being successful. Sure. You might say there's DNA. Sure. You might say there's luck, black swans, and all that. But what you can change is the work rate, whether that's recording a podcast, writing a book, filming a video, editing a video, uploading a video, giving a talk, organizing a tour, traveling, teaching. Yep. The actions of men are the best interpreters of their thoughts, said James Joyce. So judge a man by his actions, not his words. And we say that about girls as well. Yeah. Don't listen to her words. Listen to her actions because definitely with girls, there's this huge gulf between what they say and what they do. But do it with men as well. And don't be one of these keyboard guys that are complaining. Use the tools that you've got, the phone and the Twitter and the Instagram and the video and the the blog to fuel your action. Be accountable. Document your action. Yeah. These are fantastic tools in times we live in with WiFi and with the camera on your smartphone. These are fantastic. So you can use the blog for good. You can use your Twitter for good. Don't be this angry guy on the Internet. I've jokingly said in the past, there's an inverse correlation between how angry you are on the Internet and how many hot girls you sleep with or you could say how successful you are. Alright? So be careful what you think about. Be careful where you put your attention because our thoughts become our actions, our thoughts become our behaviors, our thoughts ultimately become our habits. And that's your decision, my friend, what you're hustling on. Are you a negative hustler? Are you a positive hustler? I thought I would get a bit of burnout this year like I've got in 2015 and 2014, but because of the balance in hustling that I've been doing this year, I feel energized. I'm certainly not slowing down. I'm just getting started with this Tom Torero, grab life by the horns, daygame street hustle thing. I'm full of energy. The balance is good. I'm not taking a massive winter hibernation this year. I am ready, and I thank you for your support on iTunes, on YouTube, on social media, on coming up to me, on buying the stuff that I put out. It means a lot. It allows me to do what I do. It fills me with gratitude. I don't take it for granted, and I'm very, very grateful. And I hope the hustling that I'm doing is inspiring your hustle. Let me know whether that's daygame, whether that's unplugging, whether that's minimalistic living, whatever. Go in for it. One life as cheesy as it sounds. Grabbing life by the horns. The time is now. Be a man of action. That was podcast 77. Respect the hustle.