---
title: Episode 89 Back To The Future
episode_number: 89
era: mid
source_file: Episode 89 Back To The Future.mp3
audio_size_mb: 58.8
duration_sec: 1926.6
duration_min: 32.1
language: en
provider: deepgram
model: nova-3
diarized: true
confidence: 0.998
transcribed_at: 2026-05-28T07:32:43Z---

# Episode 89 Back To The Future

**Speaker 0:** If you can't make your Tom Torero podcast 89 with a voice that is about 89% there. It might slide a little bit during this podcast, but recovered. Christmas is over. We are in that interim period where nothing really seems to happen between Christmas and New Year. People start thinking ahead to New Year. It's a time for reflection. It's a good time to stop and think about your daygame in the past twelve months and plans for the future without making shallow resolutions and promises. We shall come on to that. So the title, back to the future, not meaning Michael j Fox, although I do love Huey Lewis and the news and that shot of Michael j Fox playing guitar on the stage that inspired me to buy a guitar actually when I was a kid. What am I talking about? I'm talking about back being 2016 and the future being the year ahead, 2017 brand spanking new. I will say it now. I wish you a very happy, healthy, horny year ahead if I don't speak to you in whatever form before then. And I thank you for your support in 2016, whether you've been listening to these podcasts, downloading them, watching the videos, supporting what I do by buying my material, coming to talks, coming to say hello to me, emailing me, taking live or Skype coaching with me. Thank you very much. You allow me to do what I do. I hope it's win win. I put out content. I get to do this as a job. It's still surreal. It's still bizarre, but, bigger and better things to come, I hope. Before we kick off, as I always say, a little thing at the beginning, an announcement about the winner of a free copy of my hardback textbook Street Hustle. I asked on YouTube who wanted it for free. Around 500 people wanted it remarkably, and I used a random generator to pick the winner, and that was Pavel Durkovich, I think we say. Maybe he's Czech, maybe he's Polish, maybe he's Slovak. Somewhere in Middle Europe, I've, replied to your comment underneath that video, Pavel, and I've said, please send me an email so I know which address to send the book to. But congratulations. I hope it fuels ignites your street hustling for the year ahead. First of all, let's think about these promises then because we sit here at this time of the year and we say, wanna do this. I plan to do this. These are my resolutions. I'm gonna tell everybody about them on Facebook. I am super motivated because I've just been to a seminar or I've watched all these videos or I've read a book, and I feel like I'm gonna do it. Amazing. Here we go. Yeah. And then, obviously, 95% of people or whatever don't follow through or it doesn't last beyond a few weeks in the gym or a couple of daygame sessions. So I tweeted recently, and I fully believe this. I said forget conscious resolutions and promises for 2017. Form autopilot habits through daily repetition instead. So that's the grind. They used to say twenty eight days, but currently science says about sixty six days for habit forming, and then depending on what it is, a year, two years of keeping going. But that sixty six day period is the painful one, where it's in your forebrain, you have resistance to it, you have procrastination, you have to struggle, you have to get out of bed, you have to go outside, shut your front door, and go and do day game. You have approach anxiety. You have the weasels. You have the spotlight effect. You might not have a wing. You might have all these doubts, and it feels weird. You run out of things to say. You eject too early. We all know the day game grind, the day game struggle. Some days you feel amazing, and then you can rely on vibe. But more often than not, your vibe is weird, tired, lethargic, depressed, nervous, angry, pissed off in your head, and you gotta push through. That's the meaning of the grind. So if if you wanna get started and you've never done daygame before really, and you've got access to a medium or a large city, then hit the streets for about two months. Find a wing. It's a lot easier. I've done a getting started video just now on my YouTube channel where you hear Craig's story of how he got started in Bristol, a pretty small city in the South Of England with a wing called Ollie, and then they went to London to bash out the sets. And I give you the material on the London daygame model, on the texting model, and on the dating model. And I give you access to over 250 guys around the world who want to be your wing. So stop the excuses. As I've said in other podcasts, suck it up. Right? When I started daygame, there was none of this. There wasn't even a real model. So now you're spoiled with free information. You don't have to buy street hustle. It's largely on my YouTube channel if you choose to watch every single video and make notes. So we need to move it from this forebrain struggle, which we all feel that is procrastination, to a hindbrain habit. The brain has different parts, and the thinking bit, that's why we put our hand on our forehead when we're having a crisis or thinking heavily, that's forebrain. That's all in the front. That's evolved. That's why we have a big forehead. Certainly, I do. Overthinking, worrying, anxious, but good for creativity, productivity. In the hindbrain, that's a flight fight, you know, eating, sleeping, having sex, all the core things. And we move things into that part of brain when we automate them so we don't need to think about them. In fact, you could say there's three parts of the brain. That's a simplistic model, but look it up. So we're moving things onto autopilot, like brushing your teeth or having a shower, hopefully, or eating food or tying your shoelaces. Yep. Things you simply don't think about, and they just happen. So that is the challenge for getting started with all of this or whatever your thought is about what you'd like to achieve, whether that's writing, whether that's a new skill, a new hobby, whether that's with your eating, with your exercising, and with your cold approach pickup, you gotta go out there and do it. Yes. Not sexy. Yeah. That advice doesn't sell, but the grind is king. And slowly, you start to enjoy it when it's automated. That's my little nag over. So, forget the resolutions. Forget the promises. Form habits. Right. Things that I am grateful for, thankful for in 2016. This is a good time. As I've said before, gratitude is one of my secrets. No. Not gratitude to a wizard in the sky, but just an awareness of what's going on. Zooming out, you're alive, you're standing on a planet, spinning through time and space. You stop. You think what you've got. You think what you've achieved. Because, you know, when you're climbing, you're you're always looking at the summit. You never turn around and think, fuck it all. That was a long way. I should be proud of myself. And this is key. I know I believe in how to game first and then in a game change, but I'll be looking more and more at, these thought processes, these patterns, these mindsets that go alongside hand in hand with the daygame that you're doing. Yet they're not good enough on their own. That's just a cheesy self help seminar, which is actually a delay for taking action. But if you do the action and you start thinking about these things like gratitude, then it really helps. Anyway, what am I thankful for in 2016? I've made some notes as I've been, traveling in the last few days. First of all, fast Wi Fi. In a lot of places in the world where you wouldn't think there would be fast Wi Fi, there's extremely fast Wi Fi. Some of the slowest is actually in Great Britain, in places like Heathrow Airport in or in cafes in London. Really slow Wi Fi. Really fast Wi Fi in bizarre, quite poverty stricken countries or even Middle Europe. Awesome fast WiFi, which just makes my life easier for uploading videos, for doing my work. Silly things like boarding passes now on my phone. Yep. You had to print them out in the past with Budget Airlines or get a boarding pass in the machine, but now most of it scanned on my phone. So, that's got frequent around the world, and I love it. Uber is one of the greatest things when you travel, and you don't wanna be ripped off by local taxi companies. So install Uber, super efficient. Love the business model. Can't speak highly enough about Uber. All over the world I've taken Uber. Same with Airbnb. One of the greatest ideas that is very similar to Uber, cutting out the middleman. Airbnb allows me to stay in these beautiful places, really weird, eclectic, eccentric, creative, slick, all these amazing apartments around the world, sharing them with wings are on my own. Fraction of the cost of hotels, easy to do. I'd be lost without it. I love it. Same with Skype. Skype is where I do my online coaching, and I talk to my mates, I talk to my family, or I use FaceTime, whatever. Video calling is now on most apps, but I absolutely love Skype. I've used it for years, I'll carry on using it. The workhorses, my MacBook Air, which hopefully I'll replace quite soon, because I've noticed it is slowing down a little bit. I've had it, I think, for about five years. My iPhone or my current iPhone, because I've gone through a few through damage or loss, but the video camera on that, the capabilities of an iPhone, it's mind blowing if you think about men on the moon 1969, and then you look at your iPhone and you compare the technology. Jesus Christ. Yeah? My cameras, I'd be lost without them. My little portable vlogging g seven x mark two after the Kazakhstan disaster. It's a beautiful camera. No. Audio is not great, so you might need to combine it with a remote mic, but visual quality, portability, amazing. My big daddy, the Canon seven fifty d, which is on a tripod with that, external mic on the DSLR, high quality, not too expensive, amazing for YouTube. GoPros I'm using less of because ironically the iPhone kind of takes over. Yeah. GoPros are good in dusty or wet or dodgy situations, but other things are surpassing them. So I think buy buy GoPro pretty soon, but it's been fun. And the addition of Cray coming along with a drone on a lot of trips, drone footage from Canada, drone footage from Las Vegas, it's just ridiculously beautiful. And drones are now portable, small, getting cheaper. So part of the future of video, learning how to fly a drone. Craig learned how to fly a drone. Joking. Right. What else? Do I use daily Final Cut Pro? Beautiful piece of editing software that I use daily. YouTube is a platform. I still love it despite, some niggles. ITunes is a platform. The other social media platforms that I use, getting slicker, getting quicker. Video is king, and I love video. Lulu is a self publishing website. Upwork is a place to find freelance contractors. So I have the ideas, but for some things like coding or artists and designers and editors, you share the love a bit like Airbnb and Uber. Yeah. It's a fantastic invention cutting out expensive middlemen. Coming on to the people that I've traveled with, daygames with, lived with, had a laugh with, Alex, Ian, Craig, Rami, Tim, Turkish, Richard. I saw Ollie in Bristol at the street attraction boys once again, Eddie and Rich around the world, other guys that I've had coffees with, other guys that have moved for daygame to different cities, podcast guests I've had on. They've done it for free, so I appreciate that. People like Black Dragon. People like Tom, shout out to shout out to young Tom who's doing phenomenally well with leaving his job and unplugging. All the students that I've coached, many live this year all over the world, but also many on Skype. And I'm really enjoying the Skype coaching because it's portable for both me and the client. Yesterday, I did a Skype session where the guy was actually out daygaming. And he had a mic on, and he was walking around, and I could listen to him from the comfort of my own home, and then we'd do feedback just like a session. So, cheers to all the students that I've met this year. Those people who have supported me, like I said, they brought street hustle. I launched that, I think, in February this year. It's, it's my baby. It's my hardback textbook. It's still selling really, really well. It's been in the top three of the Lulu charts in its category all year. It hasn't dropped out of the top three. So I'm very grateful. Plus my other books, Torero Travels, daygame, how to flirt with girls, they're all physical, and they're all digital. No. How to flirt with girls is just digital. But the other two, in all the formats, still selling well. I've done talks. I've done meetups. I've met, communities of daygamers all over the world. Guys have come up to me on the street and said hello, so thank you for that. All the emails I've got, even the haters, even the spam, even the trolls, but the guys that have really emailed me. And they don't want anything. They just wanted to report back on what they've done and to say thank you or to share a story. That keeps me going because when I open my emails in the morning, the first thing I see is the spam and the trolls, and then I read the good stuff. So it kind of balances itself out. And to you who are now, as I've said, listening to this podcast, watching it on YouTube, you're downloading it on iTunes, you've, supported my channel. It allows me to do what I do. And now I think on YouTube, we've had over 2,000,000 video views. That is pretty nuts considering this channel was really a second or a third version of me on YouTube because my very early videos 2009, 2010, they were on other people's channels, and I didn't have access to those videos. But since having my own channel and doing my own videos under my own brand, we've got 2,000,000 video views. That is nuts. It's still impossible to wrap your head around social media clicks and views. Because if you imagine giving a seminar to 2,000,000 people or even doing a TV show and 2,000,000 people watching it, well, that's nuts. Yeah. Same with podcasts. I think on iTunes, we've had a total of hang on. A 185,000 downloads. That's just on iTunes. That doesn't include the YouTube stuff of all the episodes. So who would have thought I started out on iTunes as a bit of fun? The podcast was just a bit of fun. And more people say that that's their most, that's their most that's their favorite thing that they like over the YouTube content. They look forward to the weekly podcast. Who'd have thought? And I enjoy doing it. It's half an hour of my time a week, but, yeah, here we are on iTunes. Episode, what, 89 coming up to a 100. We'll talk about the 100 episode, the hundredth episode, and how hopefully you'll be on it. I'll talk about that in in future weeks. What else? What else? I think that's enough praise. That's enough gloating. It's important to gloat. I have to stop and look back and think what I have done. Also, I've just basically finished, stealth seduction. So not only did I have to edit that stuff, but, obviously, I had to film it. I had to film it. So that was epic. I feel like, okay. If I never do anything day game related again, which don't worry, I'm gonna do. But if I didn't, if I died today, dropped down dead, I'd have it all written down in street hustle, and I'd have it all shown in stealth seduction. So it's a huge weight off my shoulders achieved in under a year, the whole Torero cannon. So, yeah, that's, the gloat. That's my ego getting bigger, my head about to explode. Gratitude is good. Yep. Every day I think about gratitude. I've talked about this in other podcasts. What are you grateful for in terms of your family, your friends, your health, your opportunities, the things you've got? And you just pause and you think about it, and then you carry on, and it gives you this fuel. I've spoken about that, I think, in the Rational Optimist podcast where I've said, and I'll say it again, avoid victim mentality, avoid wallowing, especially if you get into kind of quote, unquote red pill stuff. Don't become a part of the monosphere where you see it as a negative. You should bloody see it as a positive. Get out there. Daygame. Use it to your advantage. There's all these loopholes in your favor. Lover, not the provider. It's awesome. So get out there, but don't just sit there and think, god, the world is going to shit and, god, women are horrible and I hate everybody because that's wallowing. And currently, a lot of men, even pickup guys, they're wallowing in this vague apocalyptic doom and gloom, thinking the world is about to end at any second. Yeah? Because they're basing their reality on news headlines, on, other forms of news, on clickbait, on groupthink, on forums. And I've said, if you actually look at hard data, facts, and science, you'll see the world is ticking along quite nicely. Right? Extreme poverty, child mortality, illiteracy, they're at historic lows. Right? The war deaths currently are at a fraction of, war deaths from, I think, nineteen fifties to nineteen nineties. Even world homicide rates are dropping. Yeah. Look at the opportunities you've got. Look at the iPhone in your pocket. Look at the laptop that you use. Look at the the access to books and movies you've got just online mostly for free. Look at the travel opportunities. It's fucking nuts. So no more moaning. That includes me. That includes you. No more moaning. And that's not being blind, blindly optimistic. It's being irrational optimistic. I always say you sort yourself out first. That includes me. I sort myself out. I put all that effort that, could go into worrying about doom and gloom and being a victim. Put all that effort into changing yourself. Think about all the hours someone spends doom and glooming on the monosphere. If they just, spent those whatever four hours a day maybe scrolling through feeds and logging on and worrying, if those four hours a day were outside talking to girls or in nature going for a walk, doing a creative project, creating more than they're consuming, then the changes would be rapid. So I'm lecturing myself. I'm also lecturing you because we have the same issues, procrastination, worry, depression, lethargy, a bit of anxiety. This is how we overcome it. This is how we overcome it. Let's think of the downers of 2016. I've scribbled these down too because guys are saying, well, it's all just self congratulation. So, obviously, you have downers, ups and downs. That's part of the game. If you're a professional poker player or a pickup artist, you lose, as I've said, more than you win. Yeah. I can blot out the losses often, but they're there. Know, as I said, over 10 girls on my bed, nearly there, and I lost them. I've lost loads of girls over text or on dates from over pulling, being over keen, trying to be too much the lover, moving around too quickly. So, yeah, there's been failures. And guys say, you never talk about the failures. I've said, you know, to have one lay, approaching 30 girls, maybe sometimes 50 girls on a good week, good month, 20 girls, you get laid. One out of 21 out of 30, or one out of 50. That's a daygame reality. Yes. No. Maybe. Yeah. I've missed out on a lot of family things by being away, by traveling so much. Definitely guilty of that. Guilty of not keeping up with friendships or not visiting friends enough because my selfishness is both a blessing for work and daygame, and it's a curse for missing out on the constant. Yeah? Having a bit more gravity. Same with, I tried to have an apartment this year. I put money down and had a contract for six months on an apartment in Middle Europe, and I basically wasn't there. Maybe I spent less than two weeks sleeping in that apartment. Other people were in there, but it was a waste waste of money, waste of space. Yeah. I was just, still traveling. My weight has fluctuated. I was doing well. Last December, January, I lost 10 pounds. I was very trim doing my body weight exercises, eating clean. And then off to February, when I was back on the constant holiday mentality, the lack of routine mentality, the airports and weird, you know, habits and eating on the go and eating too much sugar, I put most of it back on. Currently, in a clean period and exercising again, so so let's see. That's for me to sort out. I missed the deadline with cold calling. That's that book about daygaming in the former Soviet Union just because stealth seduction took over and became a lot bigger than I thought it was gonna be. That's what she said. So cold calling the book, it is coming out. It's it's in the folder. It will be springtime it will be released. And that links to being pulled in too many directions. Yeah. When you try to spread yourself too thin, you try to sustain good YouTube channel, then you try to write a book, then you try to make a video thing, then you try to give talks. Pulled in too many directions. You know, I was coaching one week in Berlin, then straight to Singapore, then Amsterdam. Just going here, there, and everywhere and not really organizing that properly, so that's being spread too thin. So next year, I I need to think about the coaching side of things. I need to think about the business growth. I need to take it a bit more seriously because I still think that this is something fun. This is something I I'm just doing as a side project. In my head, I still have a real job, and this is still my hobby, but this is the reality of growth, of business growth. So I've gotta take that a little bit more seriously. But, no, it's not gonna become corporate. It's still gonna be DIY. It's still gonna basically be just me. The things are gonna continue. I'm not giving up daygame. I'll talk in a minute about what's to come in 2017, but, I'm saying I just need to knuckle down a bit more with facts and figures. And, yeah, I've had burnout. This year, I've had two or three spells of burnout that have lasted one or two weeks. The black dog has returned. Depression has returned. Fatigue has returned. I've I've been ill a few times more so than I have in the last few years because of jet lag and crazy travel schedules and doing too much day game or drinking too much. Just not focusing on that balance. And, yeah, depression will always come and go. Right? If you if you've got it, you know what I mean, with the return of the black dog and you know what it is and you accept it and you know how to get out of it, you, you sweat it out, you wait it out, You talk to it. You're at peace with it. So will those periods ever go away? No. And are they part of the creative fuel? Yes. That's the, you know, the bipolar side of it. To get the creative highs, you then have periods of lows. It's getting better, certainly much better than it was in my, late teens, early twenties. That's when it hits you really hard, and you don't know what it is and you panic. So it's getting better. Anyway, plans for 2017 to finish off. Again, plans always change. I always make promises about what I'm gonna do in the year ahead, and I even write stuff down. And they change massively over the year, but these are things that are gonna be pretty concrete. I'm certainly gonna be focusing on these, doing these. And it's tempting for a creator, certainly a YouTube creator, to start off well and then want to please the fans because the fans say, oh, I love that. Do more of that. So the temptation is to revisit old stuff and just to keep doing it. Pumping it out, it's clickbait. You do, that's the spammy model. Yeah? Top three openers to get any girl or top five things to say to a French chick or viral videos. That's tempting to do, like, daygame in a Pokemon costume, and you've gotta keep saying stop. What do I wanna do? This is my creative project. And selfishly, yeah, people come along for the ride, But I am dictating what's on this channel. I'm dictating what I write. I'm dictating what's in the book, and I'm dictating what I talk about. No. That's not selfish. People are are following you, consuming what you do because, it's something new for them. So rather than trying to keep flogging a dead horse or revisit things or turn your business into clickbait, grow too quickly, yeah, I'm gonna keep it DIY because that's the theme of black sheep, grabbing life by the horns, minimizing everything I do. Yeah? And now I'm full of ideas. Right? Which is a good thing because when I started out, unplugging, quitting my job, you feel overwhelmed with, too much choice. You you get lazy. You get bored. You don't have a routine. You don't have stability. But now I've got post it notes everywhere with things to do, projects to do. I I'm fueled now. I I finally see, the direction this is going in because, again, that emerges over time. First, was a teacher, then I was a day game coach, just having a jolly around the world. And now a direction is forming from, meeting enough guys and realizing what I'm good at and what I like doing. So I shall be, as I said, finishing cold calling, that book about Russian, and former Soviet Union daygame and my travels and the pitfalls and what to watch out for. I shall really be focusing on black sheep stuff. So zooming out and looking at the black sheep life. Certainly for men over the age of 30 as well, getting into your forties, sustaining the black sheep thing. There's already three posts on my website about black sheep philosophy, black sheep beliefs, answering common criticisms. So just find Tom Torero black sheep part one two three. What else will I be doing? Well, what I won't be doing is a lot of live coaching. I've been live coaching now for about six years. Craig is doing a lot of my live coaching, and, some other guys will be taking it on as well. That's so I can focus on video, on writing, on speaking, on creative content. I've taught enough men the London daygame model. I've walked around, shopping malls all over the world, really enough. And I will do some live coaching. I've got some booked. I've got residentials booked, but that's not my focus anymore. Right? I've put the models out there. They're all on YouTube. You can be coached for free by watching beginners daygame. Yeah? I'm focusing on creating video. Video is king. Video is what I enjoy doing. Writing is painful, but video editing, shooting video, thinking about creative videos, that's what I love. Skype coaching, as I said, I love it. It's portable. It goes a lot deeper. That's what she said. Than talking about the London degging model or approach anxiety or how do I get this girl. On Skype this year, I speak to guys with depression. I speak to guys who are coming out of relationships, thinking about getting into relationships, younger guys with the road ahead, older guys, who have just come out of a divorce and they wanna get started. It's very stimulating. Right? Because it's it's a discussion, and I get a lot out of them, I hope students do. And as I said, on Skype coaching, yeah, we could do a live daygame session with you walking around, and I will be listening in and then giving you feedback just simply on Skype as long as you've got Internet connection on your phone and some headphones with a mic. Bada bing. This year coming, 2017, I shall be filming a documentary. I won't say much about it now, but it involves traveling around the world once again and, looking at daygame. It's obviously about daygame. It's obviously about black sheep, but plenty of time to talk about the documentary. I've got, another textbook in my head. Certainly, cold calling, I'll be focusing on a black sheep textbook. Because, as I said, so far it's all been out of game, out of game, out of game, technique, technique, technique, which I do believe in. You have to start with out of game. You have to start with frameworks, tools, and techniques. So you've got street hustle, and very soon in the next few days, you've got stealth seduction. So that's all my out of game a to zed. Right? There's not much more I can say about tools and techniques of game, but there's a hell of a lot more I can say about, what's going through your head, the journey, the journey ahead, not being part of the matrix, unplugging. I say it's time to help men unfuck themselves. Yeah? Rediscover your balls, stay horny, grab life by the horns, escape escape the herd, all these themes that run through everything I do. Self reliance, minimizing your life, escaping the matrix. You've seen that video on my YouTube channel. Hopefully, ways to escape the matrix. It's in Torero travels as well. This is the juicy stuff. This is stuff that I'm interested in and I will always be interested in until the day I die. This is, you know, endless discussion, endless thought as guys in their thirties and forties and fifties and sixties chip in. We all get older together. And, yeah, we've got the game skill set. We've got the daygame skill set. We know how to get a number. We know how to text. We know how to go on a date. We know how to sleep with the girl. We know how to have open relationships. And let's see what else is up for discussion, exploration. This this goes so wide. So I'm not saying start off with all the the zoomed out stuff. No. Start off by zooming in and fixing all that technical stuff. Get it down. And then, hopefully, together using this podcast, using YouTube, using coaching, using books, using seminars. Yeah. I'll be giving more seminars. I forgot to say that. Yeah. We'll get a dialogue going, and, this is something that is sustainable, and it can branch out in so many directions. I've got a guy, an old mate of mine who wants to record an album, a music album of covers, kind of black sheep covers of, those kind of songs, which I hope to do in 2017. He's a fantastic musician. He was a session musician for a lot of big bands in the eighties and nineties. He was a drummer. And then he became a school assistant, and he was a teaching assistant in my classroom for many years. A very cool guy. Very cool guy. What else for next year? That's about it. More travel, new destinations in South America, some new ones in the Balkans, didn't get to The Middle East this year. We'll we'll get there. Some new FSU destinations, new adventures, but but that's enough to think about. That's my 2016 review looking ahead to 2017. Once again, it's been a great year. Thank you for your support in whatever form. I wish you a very, very happy, as I said, healthy, horny 2017. Next podcast will be next year. Speak to you then. Ta da.